What was my husband thinking texting his coworker this?

My husband text a former male coworker to tell another former coworker(female) that he loves her and she'll always be his Mexican chica.

I approached him about the text and he swears on his life that he meant nothing by it, he doesn't look at her that way and that he isn't messing around.I don't buy that crap..what makes somebody send such a message.

He told me that he confided in her when we were going through our problems living at his mom's house at the time-and he had no one else to turn to. He said that she gave him an unbiased opinion of situations that were going on between us. Mind you, I would tell him the same thing, but when she said it , he listened...what makes her words so golden? I thought.

He says they've worked together for five years and it is nothing but a work friendship, but I told him it sounds like flirting to me and he denies it.

What do you guys think about this situation?


Most Helpful Guy

  • In the absence of anything stronger, I'd say drop it. There was a girl that I managed who I really enjoyed spending time with. She was in a relationship, but we could always talk frankly about love and our personal lives. I generally didn't do that at work with girls due to not wanting to seem overly friendly. After a while though, I got to know her well enough that one of the nicknames I gave for her was "wifey". She thought it was funny and neither one of us ever thought we'd be in a relationship together, but we did share a lot of great conversation.

    If I could poke inside your head right now, I'm guessing that it is hard for you to understand that you husband had such a close relationship with another woman, when that emotional intimacy is something that you deeply desire. There's nothing wrong with the way you feel, but he doesn't appear to be guilty of anything more than a casual text. I'd say focus on whatever current issues you may have in your marriage (if any) instead of bringing this other girl into the picture that doesn't seem like an affair.

    • This is some decent advice. If you start looking for problems where there aren't any, you're sure to creat some.

    • Show All
    • I told him I forgave him because I deeply believe that the message meant nothing because he truly poured his heart out to me...besides, I did a little research and my findings weren't consistent with someone who is cheating. He just really has to regain my trust with other little things that are going on. He is trying because he knows he doesn't want to lose me to stupidity.

      Thank you for the insight

    • Glad that went well. Work on your marriage day by day. :)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Wait just a moment. I call shennanigans.

    Since when does a guy tell another guy something like that? There is no way I would express my feelings about another woman to a man, unless it came out like "Anyone touches her, and they'll die."

    I don't know... he probably thinks she is awesome, but just awesome and that's it.

    However, opening up to people does create a kind of trust. Since she is a co-worker, the trust is stronger than it would be with strangers because she is in a position to break that trust in a more damaging way (at his place of employment).

    I don't think anything has happened, or is necessarily going to happen, but it is a risky street there. I'd keep an eye on it. Especially if he starts treating you REALLY good out of the blue. Some guys feel guilty when they cheat and try to treat their SO's better as a kind of subconcious way of making it up to them.

    • : ) Pedantic, he did start treating me extra special or everything was going extremely well with our relationship (intimacy and all that jazz) that's what made me start to wonder, okay everything is going too well with us_what's the catch. I started to snoop through his phone randomly and that message was what I found...and at that time, I said I knew it! Woman's intuition. Yes, we are a work in progress...and my eyes will be forever opened on his friendships.

  • could be an emotional affair. besides, a latin mistress is a beautiful cliche', let it be


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