I've puzzled over this for a while, I'm not in a rush to get a girlfriend or anything, I mean, I'm only 19, but whenever I think about it, my mind goes blank! Shy? or Outgoing? adventurous or stay-at-home? I just don't know. Is there anything I could do to help figure this out?
Most Helpful Girl
There are some simple things you can start out with:
1. Her AGE, do you care about how old the person is compared to you? FOr me, he guy had to be around my age. I married a guy exactly my age (few days younger).
2. Their morals, you have to care about what morals they have? do they believe in lying, cheating? Stealing? Manipulating? My sister is a Christian and so am I, but she believes in lying to her parents to go out with guys, stealing from her friends and stealing girl's boyfriends and husbands and manipulating others to get what she wants. How do you find out this stuff? you just have to be their friend, ask them questions about themselves, etc. Or if you want, ask about their morals straight up. (i.e. my sister and I had a conversation about people making mistakes and she says that she NEVER made a mistake even though she had stollen numerous people's boyfriends and husbands and cheated on her own husband and had an affair with another guy, got a divorce etc) I'm just saying, morals are important. You have to be able to trust the person. You have to have a good sense of judgement.
3. Appearances do matter! You have to be somewhat attracted to the person. Does height or weight matter to you? Does the way they dress matter to you? For me yes. I couldn't be with someone extremely over weight. Could only be his friend. I couldn't be with someone who was 6 inches shorter than me, could only be his friend. It did matter to me the way they dressed, I couldn't be with someone who had tons of earings on his face and tattoos that scared me.
4. Their past history should some what matter to you. Did they treat their exes correctly? Did they act like a total loser and let their exes use them and treat them like trash? HOw many exes did they have? How many cheated on them and why? How many did they cheat on and why? How many kids do they have with their previous exes? I mean you're only 19 so maybe there aren't that many girls out there your age who have kids but when you're older this is a good question to ask. My sister was with a guy who treated his ex like sh*t and then left his ex for her, and then continued to treat my sister like sh*t as in hit her, use her for money, and sex and never worked a day in his life. My guy right now let his ex treat him like sh*t, and so he treats me like sh*t because she treated him like sh*t. You got to get down to the psychological bottom of things if you really want to know why they are treating you bad.
5. Work history probably matters too. My sister's ex never ever worked, and he lied about working. He just used up her money. My brother in law's ex never worked and she just partied and did drugs all the time while he was at work.
6. That leads to: DO YOU WANT TO DO A TON OF DRUGS? LIFESTYLE MATTERS. My husband's ex and him did a ton of pot together, that's all they did was do pot and have sex. I had to face this issue... terrible just terrible, I have no more space...0