He was Engaged to his Ex. Does that make me his rebound?

I started dating a guy 4 months ago. We met randomly. I was out with my girlfriends, he was taking clients to a martini bar. He's well educated, well traveled, funny, friendly and super cute. Pretty much everything on my list. He has never talked about us in a boyfriend/girlfriend kind of a way. I'm pretty sure he isn't seeing anyone else even though his myspace and facebook say "single." He's planned something for Valentines day, and in all other ways acts like a boyfriend.

I've always thought it was weird that he mentioned his ex alot. On our first date he said she didn't talk to him anymore because he wouldn't marry her. I figured they had talked about it, he did want to get married, they broke up.

In a recent conversation regarding the movie Blood Diamond, I mentioned that I don't like diamonds and he said he had one - the engagement ring his ex gave back.

I now know he gave up the opportunity to live abroad in order to marry her (though he admits it was a stupid thing to do). But I don't know how long they were engaged for, or how long ago it ended. He wouldn't give the whole story about how it ended because it was "too long of a conversation for right now."

I am beginning to think now that all signs point to me being the rebound girl. I figured by now we'd be boyfriend and girlfriend, but I was willing to give him until 6 months before I call it a loss. I'm wondering if I should cut my losses and run now though?


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What Guys Said 2

  • It's hard to say (in my opinion) if you are a rebound or not. It seems as if he is still troubled by the last relationship he was in and hasn't completely moved on from it. If he has all those postive attributes, why not stick around a little longer. Tell him how you feel and ask him some upfront questions. If you're serious about him, let him know. If doesn't feel the same, then you'll know if you should move on.

  • I don't know if you're a rebound or not.

    He's only a few months out of a serious relationship. He's still hung up on his ex. Those are normally rebound signs.

    But rebounds usually are over fast. They don't usually last 4 months.

    I think you need to talk with this guy about what you want, and about what he wants.

    Good luck.


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