Could someone give me some advice/ thoughts on this?

My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 months. When the semester ended, I went home (which is 2 hours away from the college I attend) for the week. Last Thursday was the last day my boyfriend and I hung out before I came home. I had to move my things from one on campus apartment to another so I was at my school. My boyfriend had something going on so he wasn't able to help me move.

Later on Wednesday night, around 11ish, I was talking to him. I told him that I would drive over to his house (which is about 20 minutes from campus) and hang out for about 45 minutes or so then leave. After some discussion, he decided that I shouldn't because he needed to sleep because he had to be awake at 7.

I was willing to drive to his house just for a short amount of time with him. I would have thought that he would be willing to sacrifice a little sleep to hang out with me, but he obviously wasn't. We haven't seen each other in a week and he doesn't seem to care.

Since I've been home, we've barely talked and when we have, I'm usually the one initiating the conversation. A lot of times he doesn't even respond to me when I text him. Besides this everything has been going great between us.

I don't know what to think of this. Maybe I'm overreacting or taking everything to seriously. Any advice that you have would be greatly appreciated.


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What Guys Said 1

  • For some guys, this is a sign of a lack of interest. For others, they just don't understand that it's important to you and only think about relationships is a more "practical" way. He made a practical, rational decision, as I'm sure you'll agree, but that's not necessarily what we want from our SO. Sometimes we want irrational passion and devotion and desire, and perhaps he doesn't really understand that.

    IMO, the only thing to do is wait until you see him face to face, and then talk about this, and see how HE feels. You need to know how he thinks, and how he reacts to your feelings, and see if you can reach an agreement, or this relationship is never really going to go anywhere.


What Girls Said 1

  • Something very similar to this happened to me recently. My boyfriend and I didn't deal with the problem until way too late and when I did express my feelings to him we damn near broke up because we came to the conclusion my boyfriend wouldn't have more time to spend with me. I told him just that, that if I had to spend 2 hours on public transportation to go see him during the summer, when we were apart, I would do it but that it hurt my feelings not to be sure he would do the same in return. Bottom line, I explained to him that I was feeling miserable because I felt like I was making more effort than him to spend time with him.

    My boyfriend explained to me how he felt about that and I discovered then that our time spent together didn't satisfy him anymore. He felt like we always did the same things when we were together and he didn't get to know me more than before. Because of that, he had lost interest in me, just like MrOracle speculated about. Of course, your relationship isn't the same as mine but I'll suggest that there might be an underlying problem to your relationship that you have no idea about. I thought too that it was just a matter of dedication and effort and it wasn't the case. It was beyond that. And as I said, I waited until it ruined everything between us so I'd REALLY suggest you talk about it before it gets so bad you consider breaking up with him.

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