What do I do about my unhealthy relationship?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year. We moved in with one another in December and ever since then our relationship has went down hill. All we do is argue and say really hateful things to each other and then get over it and go back to acting like everything is fine. But that feeling never goes away.. I think he hates me, he thinks I hate him. And even though we swear that's not true that's how we both feel and it makes really unhappy towards ourselves and just in general. He always threatens to leave me and then I beg him to stay.. Here lately when he has threatened to leave I don't do that anymore and he stays anyways. We both want out of this relationship. We know it isn't healthy for either of us. Though I don't have a job or a license right now it makes things hard on me. And he doesn't have anywhere to go and can't afford a place on his own. I'm not really sure if we stay with each other because of that or because were so emotionally damaged, and have been together for so long, we feel as if we have to stay, or can't with out the other. I know what I should I do. Neither of us our happy. And I want him to be.. But I don't want him to leave.. I don't think I could bare him leaving. What do I do?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Well, either you sit down, and talk, and figure how to make things better. If it doesn't work, or you can't talk about it, it's time to break up and move on.

    But if you do decide to talk it out, you should try to come out with WHY you say all the hateful things, and what you can do to fix this problem. And at the same time, hold yourself from saying hateful things, and rather tell him that you're not happy with what ever he did / did not do.

    • That would be great except he doesn't want to talk about it. He blames all of our problems on me. So why talk about the problem when I'm the issue? So he says. He thinks he does nothing wrong. No not him. If I told him I wasn't happy about what he did it would be a big argument. And then it would be all my fault, because I shouldn't of told him what he did wrong, because to him, he didn't do anything so why am I bitching, he would say.

    • Then the break up step is next, I know that girls usually have a problem with letting go, even if everything points towards it being the only reasonable thing to do. So I'd say you should "Man up" and dump him.

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