The best friend vs. the perfect guy.

I'll try to make this brief. I am a girl.

I have had a best guy friend (Josh) for five years now. He is two years older than me. We've always dated other people and helped each other through them when they were working and when they were failing. He has helped me through some really tough times. We went to separate colleges.

At my college, I met a guy who I think I dreamed up (Tom). Literally he's everything I could ask for. We are two peas in a pod. Our only major difference is he likes hardwood and I like carpet. He's even cool with waiting to have sex until marriage- we are not super religious, but both still virgins and we think it would be awesome to wait.

He lives 6 hours away and I have not seen him this summer, but I do volunteer theater with Josh who lives 15 min away. I have developed romantic feelings towards him, and I'm pretty sure he feels the same way. It's like it has always been understood that he is mine and I am his, and now that we are older and both more mature we are starting to look at each other as girlfriends/boyfriends do.

My problem is I think I love them equally. They are both amazing boys. I can't see myself ever hurting Tom, but I feel like just being in the same room as Josh is like cheating because the feelings are so strong.

Tom is a little autistic and takes little things to be very hurtful and is always worrying that he is doing something wrong. If I were to leave him, he would be devastated. Plus, I don't know if my feelings for Josh are just because I haven't gotten to see/talk to Tom in a while because we have opposite work schedules. (Did I mention that conversation with Josh is so natural, while with Tom it's very forced sometimes?)

I don't mean to be a bitch. I just need someone to help me sort out my feelings. Anything is appreciated.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Perfect guys aren't perfect. Josh already knows you better and accepts you and your flaws. If its an equal tie, I'd go with Josh.


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