How would you know the difference between a rebound and a real deal?

This guy just got out of a bad relationship, and he's been trying to break up with this girl for a while. I always thought he was a nice guy, but since I knew he's not single, I never made any moves. Now that he's single, he's been flirting with me nonstop, and really tries to hang out with me without other mutual friend of ours. He also started confiding in me with some really personal stuff, so we definitely became good friends, at the very least. He hasn't made any moves (physically) yet, although he's been suggesting all these things we should "do together"

I'm trying to see if he's just rebounding on me, or if this is a real deal...


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Thats easy...TIME.

    Hopefully your not one of those chicks who thinks she knows someone after a couple months, then gets all hurt when the guy dumps her after having sex.

    If your interested in more than just sex with this guy, then tell him you don't mind seeing him or going out, but that you want to take things really slow.

    Dont get too physical with him or lead him on. If he wants anything serious with you, he will respect that and take as much time as YOU need.

    If he gets pissed off that you don't want to fool around, or have sex then there's your answer.

    How much time should you wait? Id suggest going out and getting to know him at least 6 months if you only see him once or twice a week. Maybe 4 months if you spend time with him almost every day.There's much more to a relationship than "oh he's so nice", "oh he bought me this chain/outfit".

    Who does he hang around with?

    What kind of friends?

    Does he have a good relationship with him parents?




What Girls Said 1

  • you are getting played...i wouldn't trust his intentions, especially since he just came out of a breakup...and if you want a relationship with this guy, I would be careful! you can just ask him straight up, when he suggests things that you can "do together"...ask him what his intentions are, a hook up or a real deal? if he doesn't provided you a straight answer & instead has this ridiculous smile or chuckle on his face, then you can probably gather you are wanted for a hookup, not a relationship.

    besides, think about many people do you know, honestly would like to jump straight into another relationship, right after a bad breakup? most (especially men I think) need sometime to chill out and take a break from this, while still occasionally getting laid, right? and frankly, it seems to me that you made yourself more available than probably your mutual friends to listen to his crap and that prob got him thinkin..."hmm, why not? maybe I haven't lost it yet and get me some"

    ps I fell for this in the past...exact same thing! the sex wasawesome and you know what, after that, I had gotten my hopes up for nothing, while he just basically decided to ignore me for a while...we didn't speak for sometime because I too wanted to get past this stupidity of mine and long time after, we started being friends...and now, I know not to fall for it again, even if he tells me about one of his recent breakups. I keep my distance...

    anyway, all I am saying is don't make the same mistake I might end up making your friendship become awkward or you might be be careful, whatever you decide...