Does the first person you love influence future partners?

Does the first serious boyfriend or girlfriend you had or the same type of people you dated in your early adulthood consciously or subconsciously influence the kind of guys or girls you date later...explain/


Most Helpful Girl

  • I love this question! Have some insight on it. Hope I don't put you to sleep.

    Sure, the first partner you meet might have an effect on the others, but the reason you chose that first guy in the first place-- goes way back.

    The first people you actually love are your parents, and for women, the first man we love, if he is around is our father.

    Whether you knew him or not, he had the absolute most influence on your future partners than any man you have dated. There are lots of new studies on this. The relationship you had with your father will literally dictate the kind of men you attract and the way you expect them to love and treat you. He helps make up what I call your rDNA ( your relationship and dating natural ability)

    There are 6 Different Types of Father Daughter relationships that puts out 5 Different types of what I like to call rDNA profiles. For women they are:

    The Doting Father: creates the Queen Bee

    The Demanding/Supportive Father creates the Lioness

    The Domineering Father: Creates the Artist

    The Distant Father creates the Tigress

    The Absent Father & Sexual Father: creates The Actress

    For example, The Actress usually had a non-existent or sexually abusive relationship with her father. Because of this, she is likely to have premature sex, end up in abusive type relationships, and goes for the bad boy, every time. She goes for these kind of guys because that is all she knows and is most comfortable with. I call her the Actress, because she needs the drama in her life. It is her "Normal". So if she were to end up with a nice quiet guy, she'd feel completely uncomfortable and eventually find a way to sabotage it only to end up with another douche.

    I won't get into the details, but whether you like the sound of it, our parents are the reason why we love the way we do. For men, its your mother. I'm not talking about physical attraction, as much as I'm referring to How You Love who you love.

    Think about the kind of relationship you had with your father. Whether your parents are still together will make a difference, but consider the guys you're attracted to. What kind of guys are they? How do they treat you?

    A lot of people don't understand why they're drawn to who they're drawn to and if you don't know your rDNA you can't make the necessary changes internally in order to be able to have healthy long-lasting relationships with the right type of people.

    Hope this helped!

    • very helpful just wish you would have given the examplesof the queen bee,the lioness, the artist the tiger,but ya I agree.

    • Show All
    • thanks for the great answer is their a website or book on this I would love to read it. thanks...

    • I'm actually almost done with the book and currently working on the website. Message me your email so that I can send you the link as soon as its done. :-)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Not in the least for me. Variety is the spice of life. My first love was a white American girl from New England, and my current is from W. Africa.

  • Yes it influences me not to pickup sluts like her again.


What Girls Said 1

  • Not really and I'm thankful for that because my first love is in jail now lol but I guess apperence wise but then again it could just be "my type" kind of stuff