What is "Respect" for Another ? (Long but I want DEPTH!)

Yes I'm being serious and I get the concept of it but I don't know I never felt (?) it. I know what self-respect is and that everyone needs it but when it comes to the "respect of others" - I don't get it.

How does someone doing a particular action you deem as not good (not necessarily immoral) make you "lose respect" for them and treat them badly or ignore them completely? Is it like people walking around thinking everyone is either godly or lowly creatures? Simple things like being a flirt makes people think they can't have one's respect. If person A thinks person B is a pushover they say they don't "respect" person B. Why is that? They're clearly nice & kind people why can't you respect them?

I always see it either you like someone or dislike someone. Simply put, either they make you happy and/or add to your life or they're negative and are toxic. Where does respect come in and why does that deter treatment towards people? People can't have flaws?

What's the idea of respect & the link towards the treatment of other on the account of "respect"?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Here is the way I see it, not saying I agree with it but I'll go by the majority of people. People have more repect for others if they have the same common interest and they have personality types that are compatible. Some people will lose repect for others just for there differences, weather it be there interest or there personality. Example, someone who is easy going queit and doesn't speak up much may be extremely kind and nice but a person that is open and outgoing and very direct will see it as a weakness because they won't stick up for themselves so will sometimes take advantage of the person because they know they can get away with it, or they'll just avoid the person all together but in the work industry normally the queit ones get taken for granted, no matter how hard a worker they are, the outgoing person will get more recognition and move up the ranks, that goes for the dating world to I guess, outgoing people normally are confident so they get the person they want to be with. So the queit shy person is seen as "weak" when I don't agree with that, that person is me, however once I'll comfortable with the people I'm around I'm no longer a push over. Also interest people judge other people of by there interest a lot and some interest people just have no repect for therefore have none for the person that does that particular activity. People are normally quick to judge before they meet someone and its much harder to earn someones respect then it is to lose it, respect is very easy to lose. The way I am though is repect everyone, even for there difference's until they can prove to you they don't want your respect. People normally arn't like that does it make them wrong or bad people? No not really, they still will respect people they have common interest in because they are comfortable with them and can relate.

    • This is similar to my line of thinking. I agree somewhat!

      That's how I feel everyone deserves "respect". The right to talk to me if they have a problem, ask questions, make jokes and as long as they're not mean or toxic people (manipulative, selfish, etc.) then I don't see it as a problem. I can be quiet too but I know how to speak up and command a room. & Just because someone is shy/introvert doesn't make them "weak" but I do agree people confuse the loudest person in the room to be strongest.

    • Shyness is just considered a weakness, never said it was but people consider it that way. For example, I'm shy when first meeting people and really hate being put on the spot and if it does happen my shyness will effect how I think because I'm too worried what other people will not like what I have to say or I'll mess up what I have to say because I'm nervous. So I'd say that is a weakness for me. People judge by first impressions, we all have done this.

    • I'm with both of you on this. I, too, am very "shy" in interpersonal things. While I can be confident in everyday situations, when it comes to dating or wanting to date somebody I get SERIOUSLY shy and feel like I'm going to "blow it". It isn't necessarily that I'm weak, I just care too much what kind of impression I am giving to the person I am so attracted to.

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What Guys Said 3

  • WOW, girl, THIS is an AWESOME and DEEP QUESTION! I REALLY RESPECT YOU FOR IT! LOL! Come on, you HAD to see THAT one coming!

    Alright, I'm no idiot and I'm not known for my "brevity", so I shall attempt this one. I say "attempt" because this is a very difficult question to answer, just as "what EXACTLY is 'love'?" You know? It's just one of those things that is SO hard to explain. However, here goes:

    First of all, there are different kinds of respect. There is your general, every day kind of respect, such as that which you have for every person alive; and then there is ANOTHER kind of respect, such as that which is sort of an "artificial" kind of thing--like how you ACT or BEHAVE in a certain situation or location (like Court, or Church, etc.). I belive what you are asking about is the former, which is the difficult one, and that is what I'll focus on here.

    Alright, to ME it means how you REGARD somebody--how you THINK of them. It's a very highly SUBJECTIVE thing because we are all different, we all feel differently about people and situations, and we all differ on what makes us "tick". I like to think of it as acknowledging the other person's right to how they feel about an issue, for one. I may disagree with what they believe or feel is right, but I RESPECT how they feel about it because that is their RIGHT to feel that way and they are ENTITLED to that belief. It's kind of like saying, "I disagree with you, but that doesn't mean I judge you any differently". Does that make any sense? You often hear something like this: "If I sleep with you tonight, would you still respect me in the morning?" I think what that person is asking is, "If I sleep with you tonight, will you think less of me in the morning?" Having respect for another person is to consider that regardless of "A" you don't "judge" them or "feel superior" to another because of YOUR views.

    If somebody is a "pushover" they don't respect them. OK, this is a bit easier to talk about. When somebody is a "doormat" and allows people to push them around or "use" them, and so on, it's kind of hard to think HIGHLY of them. Right? Why would a person allow himelf to be abused like that? If HE doesn't respect HIMSELF enough to resist being stomped on, why should anybody ELSE hold him in "high regard". You are more likely to "respect" a police officer if he is leading by example as opposed to making YOU live by the law while HE BREAKS it. Right? I know I'm kind of all over the place, here, and I'm doing the best I can, but you've asked a VERY thoughtful and thought provoking question that I think I'm actually going to need to reflect on a bit more and come back to! NICE! I LOVE these kinds of questions because they are MOTIVATING! I seriously respect you for that! Yeah, I know, not so funny the second time around, LMAO! :( Let me think about this one a bit more and I'll come back to it!

    • Oooo I love this & I find myself agreeing also. You make sense and I can follow! Don't worry I'm intelligent just not to social concepts lol. Please come back with more insight - take your time!

    • Oh but could you try and explain the reasoning of negative/positive treatment that comes with respect such as in the pushover/one night stand situation. How can one make a conscious decision to be less nice to a person based on respect even though the reason they don't respect them isn't because they're harmful. As in what's the sense of treating a person bad because they're too giving (sexually easy) or too scared to speak up for themselves. It's like kicking a person when they're down to me.

    • OK, I guess the best way to put it (and I don't feel this way, personally, because if sex happens on the first date, it's not because only SHE wanted it, we BOTH did) is because some people like the "chase" and respect somebody more if they put up more of a "fight". If they give in right up front, they lose that element of having to "fight for it" and may respect the other person less for it. Don't worry, I don't get it, either. It makes no sense to me, but I think that's WHY it happens.

  • I have always thought of respect as... sort of something that defines how... virtuous ones actions and beliefs are to someone else. It sort of follows along with the "godly/creature" thought.

    When it comes to how I view someone... Losing respect generally happens when who they are, or what they do, is far from what I find ideal. Examples: A girl who sleeps around or jumps in and out of relationships quickly, someone who wouldn't give up some of their free time to help a friend or stranger feel better.

    when someone has lost respect, it means I view them as a worse person... in a sense, I have a mental scale that runs from "human" to "person". Human is simply a creature, a blob of meat walking this earth that I should not care in the least what happens to it, and a person is part of my civilization and should be assisted whenever they need it and whenever I can. When someone reaches "Human" status, I stop caring about their emotions, they are simply not good enough for me to put effort into, and if they do anything against me I will not care to rip their emotions into tiny pieces.

    Everybody starts out neutral, with no general respect level of any kind. Less respect means I don't care as much for their emotional well being, the more respect means I care more about it.

    • "when someone has lost respect, it means I view them as a worse person..." ! I like it - it's making me think. I like your human and person comparison also & I do agree with the terms.

      I find myself having that problem of ripping into people. I can stand up for myself but sometimes someone needs to be embarrassed(as a "human") to make them "respect" you I learned. I noticed the more someone fears being embarrassed by that person that tends to correlate with their high level of "respect" for them.

    • I find that I am going to have to agree here with most of that. The thing is, I tend to respect everbody to a certain degree instead of "neutral". Then, when the let downs start, I find that the respect begins to diminish. But, it's for more serious things such as finding out they are a rapist, or that they spent time in prison for killing kittens, you know? As far as personal choices go, like when to have sex, that doesn't really enter it TOO much, but will in certain situations.

  • I think respect is something you give out 2 people until they do something that hurts your perception, they didn't meet you're standard baseline of hopes but not that they ain't good people. You cn "like" a person and still not have as much respect for em as you do 4 someoneelse, may be You can't trust them todo stuff like bring food 4 You because they all for self but they still make You happy to see them.

    • Okay thank you for your reply!

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