What do I do when two guys happen to like me at the same time?

I've been thinking of Guy1 (who is my age) as my potential boyfriend for a while. We both gave the impression that we liked each other pretty early. We hung out almost every day, had our first kiss, and things were just going great - until he went on vacation, and I started talking with Guy2 (who is a year younger than me). I had never met him, we just became friends on Facebook through my best friend. After a while he asked me if I had someone in my life right now, and I told him I did. He seemed to become upset. And I gave him all rights to be. I guess I gave him the wrong signs, cause we were basically flirting through texts for awhile. A few days later he Skyped me, and he told me all these really sweet things Guy1 never ever had said to me. I told him I thought he was the sweetest guy ever - just like the ones in the movies, and he told me I was like the girl in his dreams. I was so happy, and couldn't stop smiling. He said he wanted to show me he loved me, and that I deserved a kiss. But only if I would allow him to. And I said I would. He asked me if I wanted to meet up with him for the first time. I was really excited, and said yes. I came to his house the day after, and we sat down to watch some TV. We sat close and he started playing with my fingers, holding around me, letting me lay in his lap etc. At one point he was just staring at me, and I turned to look at him, and he kissed me. We kissed more, and we made out. I haven't told Guy1 anything yet. What do I do? I really don't want to hurt any of them, though I know I will... I feel so stupid for letting them on.


Most Helpful Guy

  • My mother used to have this "fruit analogy" for marriage. She always advised me with it. She said "Son, you can't decide which fruit you like the most without trying all of them."

    Following what she had said, I would say that breaking up with Guy1 is a good idea, because you have tried him, and he tasted good, but Guy2 seems to taste better.

    What's important here is your happiness. You can't be in a relationship just to make the guy happy. Therefore, I repeat, I think you should break up with Guy1.

    The only alternative is to break up with Guy2 and stick to the original fruit, but I don't see how that would make any sense.

    • Thank you so much! I love getting examples, and this made so much sense to me.

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What Guys Said 4

  • If Guy one was really someone you had a special connection with you would have been too busy thinking about him to pay attention to Guy 2. You haven't promised anything to these guys. I'm sure the one you don't pick will be disappointed but that can't really be avoided, so just pick the one you feel strongest for now. The longer you lead them both on the worse it will be for them.

  • Manwich

    • Uh what?

    • I think he's referring to a male-female-male threesome.

      Notice that the female is being "sandwiched" between the males, both in the wording above, and in the actual context of the words.

  • You pick me instead :) you're so pretty!

  • We all like to share passionate moments together and get compliments, but how much more do you like Guy2 personally than Guy1. As you're not officially "dating" anyone yet, you're not exactly in the wrong but you should probably stop dropping hints on more than one guy as things can get complicated. Because you let him kiss you, now he thinks it's more than just friends and guy1 thinks you guys have something real good going on also.

    • You're absolutely right. Guy2 know of the other guy though, and we promised we'd never tell anyone about what happened that day. That sounds mean, but I really don't want Guy1 to find out.

    • Yeah you don't want to jeapordize your relationship with guy1 if you feel like you're going somewhere with him first, but you should probably apologize to guy2 also if you haven't already.

What Girls Said 2

  • this is a hard situation, you want to be careful so that no one gets hurt (including you)

    but who do you like more? whoever makes you the happiest and who you want to spend your time most with is who you should commit to


    • At this point, I feel like Guy2 is being the sweetest and most caring. But then again... I don't know him too well yet. Besides; I have a history with Guy1, you know? Thanks for your answer!:-)

  • Think about how messy it would be to tell Guy1 about the things that happened with Guy2. :P

    It would be less messy for Guy2 to find out your PAST with Guy1 (though he doesn't have to know). :)

    When you find someone you like and want to spend time with, uphold some boundaries and this won't happen again. :)

    • Thank you for your answer! :-)

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