My girlfriend and I have been together for 7 years.. Yeah SEVEN.. we have a son together whom I love VERY much. My problem is this.. I don't think we were supposed to be together for this long.
You see - we met in a club.. She was overtly flirty, and I went home with her that night.. We hooked up and I never called her back.. Typical right..? Well we end up running into each other again a few months later.. and she's with her ex, who used to beat her, and is the main reason for her "issues" .. Anyway, It was awkward to say the least.. But somehow we just kept running into each other.. and she ends up moving in with my older sister. Me and my older sister always went out to clubs with each other..I was always single.. and hooking up with girls I met at the clubs.. Always searching for MRS Right.. Well we ended up hooking up again, and again, y'know.. we were basically bed buddies.. I gave her what she wanted and she gave me what I needed.. and vice versa.. one day while laying in bed we decided to be a couple.. meh.. even though I said, "I don't wanna girlfriend, I don't need drama in my life.." Well.. after a couple years together I started noticing things.. like she's REALLY insecure.. and VERY possessive of me. I USED TO have a TON of friends.. Now, I have very few.. Any time I wanted to go chill with them, without her, it turned into a fight.. Well after a couple times, I tried to leaver her.. She almost killed herself.. My father says she's taken me as an "Emotional Hostage" .. whereas, if she were to do something to herself, I would feel guilty or responsible for it and thus I have to stay.. (in her mind)..? Anyway.. so RIGHT before I'm about to for real leave her, we get it on, well guess what - she's pregnant.. So it seems that every time I've come to a crossroads - I make the wrong turn.. and the sh*t just keeps snowballing.. Honestly. I think I deserve better. I'm a good looking guy, I've got a solid job. I've got morals.. So why do I allow myself to settle for less? Now we've got a son together.. so it's even more complicated now than it ever was before.. I really don't know what I'm supposed to do..
We fight almost every day.. It's gotten physical.. (she hits me, I restrain her..) .. She has no "OFF Switch" .. I just want to be happy, but I feel that if I break it off, it's going to lessen the quality of life for my son.. Ugh.. I feel so trapped.
Most Helpful Girl
I am a child of divorce so I can honestly tell you that if there is constant tension your son feels it. It hurt when my dad left but a day later it was such a relief since I didn't feel like I was walking on egg shells all the time. The stress for me was gone. I missed my dad, he stayed in my life on weekends but it was way better since the stress was gone. My parents fought daily and it was hard on us kids. It was better this way.
I suggest that you look at how the way your relationship is currently affecting your son. If it isn't negatively affecting him, then I say stay for him. You may deserve better but really the only important thing is what is best for the children, sometimes the parents not being together is the best and sometimes staying together is the best but the children are what matter now more than anything and not your needs any more. Whatever you decide stay in your children's life.
Children tend to follow in their parents foot steps when it comes to relationships, so if the parents don't have a healthy one then chances are the children will end up in a similar circumstance as adults.0