I messed up! What can I do?

I'm already fallen for this guy who shows interest with me but last night, I think its all done. He learned that I had a thing with a guy but that was before I met him. Its too crazy that these two guys met at a time last night. My attention was with this guy I am falling for and that made the other guy noticed. He got mad and jealous then he went home that morning leaving his work/reponsibilities at site. I am very guilty with it. He might get fired for sure because of abandonment of work.

Now, the other guy I'm fallen for also backed off and I feel that He's not already in to me. That kills me inside now that both of them are gone. So confused. Do I have to talk to him? or I'll just leave it and forget them both.? Grrr so crazy

The jealous guy explained to me that he got other things/problems in his mind so he rushed home. He told me not to be guilty but thinking of what he did, (Throwing up his cp) and decided to go home immediately hunts me. He keep on insisting that we just used him .blah blah blah.. but its not my intension to do so.

Yass thanks for the well said advices:) I hope I can move on to this. I feel better now.
OMG! Last night, I accompanied the best friend of the jealous guy to attend a birthday celebration of their friend. The jealous guy promised to attend that occasion but because he rushed home and can't able to attend, we attended in his behalf. I learned that the jealous guy courted the celebrant while also courting me before! that pisses me.

He got angry at me with what I did but in fact he's dating another girl!


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is how butchered it is if I have Google translate it back: "If both men thought they were your girlfriend alone, and time with them at the same time, then you've got to move sa.Depende their race, they may be lost mukha.White guys do not matter as much, as protest until it happens to them muli.Kung Filipino, my experience is that they held together loob.Ako dated a Filipino friend crush once and we went from best friends to not I lahat.Subukan speech every now and then, but for over ten years, he did not answer the akin.Umaasa I say it well for us."

    So, to clean it up and make sense and leave out my usual verbiage, with another edit thrown in for good measure:

    ***If both men thought you were their girlfriend at the same time, then you may need to accept that neither will want to date you now. Depending on their culture, they may feel embarrassed or dishonoured. White men do not care as much, at least until it happens to them. We may just blame the other guy, and fight him. Or we could simply let whoever wants the girl at this point to have her. In my experience Filipino men can be very conservative and want to keep a good reputation in their community. I dated a girl my Filipino friend liked once. He has never spoken to either of us again (at least not me). We were best friends, even room-mates. I deserved being treated like that. I failed to respect his culture. For that reason I try to be as kind as I can to all Filipinos.

    I'd recommend getting the men's opinion in a week. If the one you want changes his mind and still likes you, everything is OK. If he is still ignoring you he was not worth it.

    If you find out the old boyfriend is the most understanding and still wants you, give him a chance. Jealousy is normal with a beautiful woman. Make sure he is not always an angry man before you date him again.

    This may just be a defining moment in your relationship. Whoever is the most understanding will get to keep you.***

    I hope I'm easier to understand in English. I won't try translating into other languages again. Not until I find a better site or program.

    Good luck and I hope this helps.

    • :)) So at least you know our culture then..nice...

      yes.. but neither of them is my boyfriend yet":)" Just a mutual understanding..confusing..

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    • See? Men are everywhere, and all trying to be with as many women as they can. You just have to wait and decide who is the best for you, and then make sure he is faithful.

      Sana swertehin ka.

    • Yess thank you:)

      Salamat, ikaw din po:)

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What Guys Said 9

  • You bear NO responsibility for the other guy's rash and immature behavior that may have put his job in jeopardy. Zero. Nada. None. You are well rid of a guy who would pull a stunt like that based on jealousy for YOU. He doesn't OWN you, you're not in a current relationship, and yet he acts this extreme after meeting a guy you're falling for... This would be putting up red flags galore if it were me and I would be very wary of letting his jealous behavior somehow secretly boost your self esteem ("Look at the crazy behavior and risks he's willing to take because he wants me so much!" ). You don't sound like you're falling into that trap, but as a dad of a son and daughter, I feel strongly that relationships built on ownership and jealousy are a dead end and harmful to both parties.

    OK, rant over.

    With regard to the guy you now like, I would really wonder if he's worth your heart and devotion if he's so easily spooked by an ex who's totally out of line. My only suggestion there is to talk with him and make it crystal clear this other guy, the Jealous Idiot, is out of your life regardless what the J.I. thinks or says or does. If he won't accept this from you, then he either has no spine or just isn't into you and is using the J.I. as a convenient way to justify not having a relationship with you without being a stand-up guy and leveling with you about it. Actually, that's even another kind of spinelessness. So, if you explain the situation and he doesn't start coming back in your direction, then he's not worthy of you and it would be best to fugeddabouthim.

  • These things happen. It's not your fault. Unless one or both thought they were your exclusive partner.

    I read you are Filipina, and there's no Google translate option for Tagalog, but there is one that says Filipino. Tell me if you read this, if not I'll just say it in English:

    Kung ang parehong mga lalaki inisip sila ay ang iyong kasintahan lamang, at oras sa kanila ay sa parehong panahon, pagkatapos mo na nakuha upang ilipat sa.Depende sa kanilang lahi, maaaring sila ay nawala ng mukha.White guys hindi mahalaga bilang magkano, bilang hangga't isumpa mong hindi ito ang mangyayari muli.Kung ang mga ito na Filipino, ang aking karanasan ay na hawak nila ng sama ng loob.Ako napetsahan crush na Filipino kaibigan nang isang beses at kami nagpunta mula sa pinakamahusay na mga kaibigan sa hindi pagsasalita sa lahat.Subukan ko bawat ngayon at pagkatapos, ngunit para sa higit sa sampung taon, hindi siya sagutin sa akin.Umaasa ako na ito sabihin na rin para sa amin.

    • LOL! oh that's tough to understan:) yass I'm filipina. Kindly translate it in English instead:))

    • Haha... I know google does a crappy job on Spanish too, so it's apt, with the Spanish influence in the Philippines.

      Tagasaan ka sa Pilipinas? I found better site but it won't translate. I'll work on it after my sister's birthday party.

    • uh-oh:) lol.. taga Nueva Vizcaya po ako.. a province of Phil.:))

  • well that's why you don't f*** around with 2 guys at one time duhh. stop being such a ho. if your planning on cheating at least have the decency to tell the guy your with that you don't want to be with him anymore. break it off instead of breaking a heart.

    • Its not my intension.. I don't have any commitment to both of them so don't consider it cheating. I was in to the jealous guy first but when I met the other guy, I got confused because I like him more. I can't tell to the first guy that I like someone else because I don't even know the real between us. He's just courting me and the other guy was planning also to court me. I just got open to both of them for me to choose...

  • Neither is worth worrying much about. If they are petty, jealous, and shallow, you shouldn't be thinking of involvement with them, right?

  • first you ust know witch one you really want and start to get back on him

    for now maybe both of them think you don't know want you want

    in any situation one will lose

    so get back on the one you like the most and get the thing right before he turn his back forever

  • do you really think that guy is telling the truth?

    the guy is pissed off do you think is gonna tell you straight in your face I'm jealous?

    it's in human nature to not say your true feeling when you're hurt

    by pride he said that

  • hahaha

  • That's what you get. Be greedy and face your consequences.

  • Pick the one you like the best then explain it to them in a non defensive manner. You should be fine.

    • I already moved on with the first guy and now fallen to this other guy but I think he doesn't like to court me anymore:/ my fault though...

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    • Yess I'll try. thanks a lot.

    • You are very welcome. Good luck honey

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