What to do about this guy I met online?

Okay so I meet this guy online...actually on this website specifically. and we became really close, of course I was careful and we Skyped and texted and we did all that for about 4 months. We kinda were going a bit fast cause we were talking about maybe having a future together cause we were "perfect for each other", and it was true and we want something serious something to last for a very long time so we didn't want to waist any time. Anyways, long story short, recently he decided we should just be friends for 2 years until he's ready to settle down (cause he says want to with me) and find a girl to marry(which is understandable) and till then he's just going to focus on college and have fun, and keep in touch with me...not to mention he lives in new York and I live in Toronto Canada, we believe were perfect for each other and were what we have been waiting for for so long. But because of school we can't right now. I was planning to move to the states after college before I met him so it was perfect if I did when we start to date seriously for marriage and stuff. So anyways I agreed about the waiting part and stuff..and now he's all like I want us to date so we can date seriously but we should have some freedom till then and see what happens, which I agreed to as well to. so now we don't talk everyday so we don't grow feeling till were ready for each other I guess, and like we text once or twice a week, but I don't text him right away. now I'm over him and see him as a friend and am living my life knowing that after college we could be something, maybe. so today he texted me and said "he missed me and wants me to text him cause he working late tonight and has been thinking about me."(nothing dirty) he also said a while back that for a "keepsake he's going to print out a picture of me that I sent him a while ago so he can have to remember me for when college is done... I'm like uhhhhh friends don't talk like that. So what does that mean? does he still like me and want to be with me one day? guys confuse me!? please help me :D!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hey I live in Toronto and am in a long distance relationship myself.

    I'm not a guru but honestly, I don't know how realistic it sounds to have your future husband picked out that you'll be with in a couple years, while in between you date other guys...You can meet a guy that you like just as much in Toronto but it doesn't mean that you'd break up with him when the other guy decides he wants to settle down, right? At the same time I know that some people grow apart but get back together in the end. You can't know what will happen, though. It's impossible and it's confusing and complicated. I wouldn't make a commitment to be with him.

    He is contacting you and telling you he misses you because...he misses you lol. He is having a hard time just being friends with you but he can't have his cake and eat it too you know? He can't call all the shots and decide to be with you only when he wants to. You said you've moved on so don't lead him on. Talk to him about the situation and how unrealistic it is. Tell him truthfully how you feel and where you stand (admitting you're over him..) that way you can do whatever you want. He won't like it but he'll get over it. Maybe you'll come in to contact again, who knows, but right now that's not what you're interested in, so don't settle for that.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I think it's not fair to either of you to be waiting for each other. Distance is so difficult to overcome, plus with all those other things that you two are in involved with, it may have been a bit fast like you said since there was so many obstacles to start with.

    I think you should let him know how you feel, explain to him what you think the friendship should be.


What Girls Said 0

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