How can I help my boyfriend's anger management?

My boyfriend struggles with anger management. sometimes he just gets into a mood where he doesn't talk to anyone, but sometimes he gets so angry with something that he starts yelling at me and tells me to breakup with him. I obviously don't because that is not him, and later on he calls me back crying saying how sorry he is and calling himself a jerk. this isn't healthy for him to be in moods all the time and to have fits of rage. I was wondering how I can help calm him down when he's in one of these situations. please help, and thank you!


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What Guys Said 1

  • First, there's only so much you can do. It's completely his responsibility to get his anger under control, and he can't be depending on others to soothe him.

    You can be patient and understanding with him, know what ticks him off, suggest that you do something together, anything to get his mind off what's bugging him.


What Girls Said 1

  • Frankly, I can't stand guys with mood swings. Been through that with my ex. It's like walking on egg shells to be in a relationship with a guy who is like a ticking bomb that can go off anytime. They need to acknowledge they have a problem and help themself first. It's certainly unfair that he's taking it out on you so think long term - can you handle this for a long time? People don't change so easily unless they realize they need to for their own sake and the ones they love. If there's no improvement, leave. You might even do him a favour by leaving. He might change or he might get worse. Nothing much you can do especially since he even bring up breaking up during one of his 'spells'. It must be very stressful and disheartening for you. If you've tried talking and telling him how you feel each time he goes off and it didn't work, move on.