What do you look for online?

To those who have used online dating sites, what do you look for when looking at someone's profile? What are the things that make you want to message a person the most? Are you a casual browser? Are you more picky than you might be in person? How do you view online dating?

I am just looking for some insight. Thanks!


Most Helpful Guy

  • First off I want to say that I found my current Girlfriend and the love of my life on Match so I believe I have some good advice to share. I was on Match for about 4 months and I only talked with three women the entire time I was on. This was not because of me being to picky, it was because of how unrealistic woman are on what they are looking for. You have to remember that you want a real person, not some fake perfect person who doesn't exist. There are plenty of pretty people on those websites but you have to learn to read between the lines and look beyond profile pictures. Look for things you really have in common that are truly important to you. The next thing you need to do is chat with people you find interesting, give them a chance to impress you with real conversation, if you like what they have to say take it to the next level and exchange phone numbers. Look, I am a white guy with what most people consider good looks. However I am only 5ft 8in and I am bald. Just based off those two qualities I was already filtered out from 90 percent of women's profiles. My Girlfriend who is amazingly beautiful gave me a chance because she liked how I put my "true thoughts" out there for all to see. When we started talking it was like we had know each other our whole lives. When we met in person it was magical, she was caught off guard how good I actually looked in person. It is very hard to understand what a person really looks like by profile pictures, sometimes you can be pleasantly surprised how people look different in person. Also don't limit yourself to a certain type, I know all women dream on Mr. Tall, dark and handsome but there are many really good men who are way better for you out there that don't fit into the dream man category. The most important thing is how compatible you are on a mental and emotional level. Attraction is important but it can come in many different forms. In some men's eyes my Girlfriend is not attractive but in my eyes she is the most beautiful person in the world. Good luck and I hope this helps.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • I like women that don't come off as having man issues. Don't say anything like "Where are all the real men?" or "Prove to me not all guys are jerks!"

    I don't respond to women, unless I meet their standards, I figure if it is important enough for them to mention, then why waste my time on them. So if you like taller guys, but are willing to date a shorter man I would say that, instead of saying "I am looking for a guy that is 6 feet tall." That makes it sound like you are not interested in men, that are even just a little shorter.

    If a woman says something like, "I am not looking for a FWB, or one night stand. I have been there and done that." This leads me to think she has a history of slutty behavior.

    Online dating just seems like a logical way to meet people you have certain things in common with.

  • I look to see what kind of lifestyle they lead and if compatible with mine.


What Girls Said 2

  • After doing online for a tiny while I came to find these funny "traits" to be a total deal breaker

    1. He doesn't write anything on his profile where there isn't much to go off of. If he's too lazy to say a few things about himself I wonder how serious he is about being online

    2. He met someone and posts all over "I met someone, don't message me" but normally does the revise of shame 4 months later

    3. Lies about his height (If you're short you're short)

    4. Instead of saying a couple things he doesn't like, like smoking he writes a list so unbelievably long only his mother could live up to it

    5. Talks about activities he lies that he did once on vacation in the poconos or since senior year gym class

    6. He puts looking for a relationship to get more messages when he really isn't looking for any type of commitment

    7. Describes himself as "Laid Back" aka I'm a passive aggressive a-hole

    9. His only pic is of him with two chicks he could never get in real life or dots his ex's face out instead of cropping the pic

    10. The ugly one only posts pics of them in groups shots of all hot people making it impossible to figure out which one you are

    To not be totally biased here is one for GIRLS:

    1. You talk waaaay too much (in great detail) about yourself

    2. Your list of dos and don'ts after number 6 hints you are narcissistic and have daddy issues

    3. You describe yourself as "Not Your Average Girl" aka I'm the worst of them all

    4. You come off as full of yourself

    5. You posts too many pics of your drunken nights in AC

    6. There more shots of your bathroom toilet then there are of you

    7. You try too hard to appeal to everyone in your bio

    8. Your really close to your family, but your pics look like they are a package deal

    9. You're so over heartbreak you're just venting the whole bio


    I know people who met online but I've learned it's not for me nor is it for everybody it only seems to work when you're not putting such an emphasis that you WILL find someone on these sites. What makes me want to message a guy is he is not afraid to write a good paragraph about himself shows his sense of humor has goals, attractive or course and doesn't live in never never land.

  • I'm for sure more picky because some people just want hook ups so I see what kind of pictures they have (just ab shots? pics with friends?) to kind of see what attention they want. Guys who have a lot in their 'About me' is also encouraging because there are more conversation starters to find. I love online dating, it's always fun. Good luck!


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