Complicated situation. Will he ever say or do anything or should I?

He eventually asked me out and we ended up in bed. I mean, technically it was a "first date", but we used to be pretty close friends before. We have known each other for years, know stuff about each other and were attracted to each other (and knew it).

Since then we keep in touch almost daily by texts or emails. We meet every couple of days when we have a chance, usually at his or my place and have food and drinks together, or watch a movie and cuddle or have sex. Sometimes we just talk for hours, cuddle and go to sleep (no sex). When we are falling asleep and when we wake up, he holds my hand or we are spooning. He gave me keys to his apartment and he comes to pick me up by car when I need to.

There's a huge trouble, though, we are both taken. The thing is, his girlfriend basically left him and moved abroad long term. My boyfriend is about to do the same soon (he was planning that for years, he wants me to come with him, but I don't want to and he always knew that).

My "guy" told me good luck with my decision. Obviously, I will have to talk to my boyfriend when he leaves abroad, I loved him but I never understood how he wanted to move and we had a lot of fights. I don't know what exactly my "guy" feels about his girlfriend. He told me they argued a lot because of their personalities, but they are still in touch.

So oficially we are taken and nobody knows about anything. No encounters with his or my friends or families, and we basically don't go out in public.

I can't talk about it with anybody, so I'm asking here, what would be the best thing to do? (I do realize cheating is wrong). Is there any way he's in love with me? Otherwise I don't much understand the effort we put into this...

We have moments when we just kiss, hug and look in each others' eyes and I wanna say something real bad, but I don't wanna ruin it. I'm with love with him, but I don't wanna be the first to say it. It's been a few months since we became "closer" like this. What do you guys think I should do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • i think you need to have a serious talk, that's not healthy to be A 'non-public' relationship. and eventually you'll probably want something serious between each other. I think you guys should both break up with your seperate spouses and be with each other.


    • Agreed, it's not healthy. But he never seems to say much about the "relationship" at all. How do I get him to talk about it? Do you think even when we do all of the above he can see it just as FWB? I would honestly be shattered if he did. And it's just so hard for me to start talking about whatever it is between us... Sorry for the rant...

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