Should I go for this girl or look for something more serious?

Since I broke up with my ex of two years, who was also two years younger than me -I'm twenty- I promised myself that the next girl would be no less than one year younger. Despite that 'promise', the next two girls I dated were in her age and a bit less, and it didn't end very smoothly. After that, I decided to think a lot on this matter. I realized that girls younger than me (or older with a younger-looking) face are my personal preference, because I tend to prefer the sweet-sexy girl to the hot-sexy one. But I also concluded that dating a younger girl would cause instability because of a huge maturity gap - I tend to be very mature for my age.

Indeed, I managed to go after a couple of girls in my University and while being unsuccessful, I was determined to never change an age group again. Until about two days ago. I was in kickboxing practice when a very attractive girl came. I thought she was in the Zumba class after ours, but to my surprise she joined the training. Obviously, she enrolled while I was absent due to a minor injury. I couldn't take my eyes off of her to the point that I got punched badly in the face! Later, in the changing room, I asked a friend what about her and she told me she has been training a while and that she is...seventeen.

The thing is, I do like her. She is totally my type and the first girl I was attracted to that likes martial arts (a huge plus for me). My first thought would be to just stop thinking and go talk to her. The other, 'will you break the promise again'? Do you think I should kind of 'live my life' and just think of now or should I go dead serious and look for a serious relationship with an older girl?


Most Helpful Girl

  • It depends on what you are looking for.

    Maturity is relative. Just because one girl that age is immature doesn't mean they all are. As you get older, the age gap there also tends to disappear.

    Meanwhile, don't do the 17-year-old thing. Just because you have the one thing in common doesn't mean you have anything else in common. What happened to the maturity you were mentioning at the start of your post? You won't be satisfied with that -- she's just another hot chick.

    Stop breaking promises to yourself.


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What Girls Said 2

  • I think your shared hobby is a good indicator of her maturity level. That takes a lot of time hard work and dedication. Just trying becoming friends with her and make it clear to her and yourself it's just friends until she passes the maturity test. The reason you made that resolution is because you got tired of tween drama. If this girl can act like and adult she deserves the chance to date like an adult and be treated like one as well.

  • I don't think it's necessarily a good strategy to decide if you should or shouldn't be interested in someone based on their age alone. At least talk to the girl ONCE before you write her off. :) You say you tend to be very mature for your age, well...maybe she's very mature for her age too. You won't know until you communicate with her or maybe just observe how she interacts with others in your class.

    Talking to her once won't ruin your life, I promise. Then after chit chatting a little, you could give the idea some deeper thought. Good luck! :D


What Guys Said 1

  • You should stick to your decision and not get sidetraced with a yonger girl again, since, as you say, ther will be a mautrity gap and you have learned that you just aren't going to connect with younger girls.

    You will be seeing her in class, so if she really seems suited to you, you can consider her again later. For now, thnik of her as an ex, so you don't get too excited about seeing her.