We were hot and heavy for 4 months, it got serious pretty fast. She asked me after a few months after we had sex if I saw us being in a relationship. I definitely did, but we both agreed it wasn't the right time. About 6 weeks later, she began avoiding my attempts to see her. When I confronted her about it, she told me she wasn't ready for anything serious, and that she was scared. So I let her go and didn't give much of a chase even though I wanted to.
We stayed in occasional contact through texting and I never got over her. I called her a few months ago and told her how things still remind me of her and how strongly I really did feel about her. She said things also reminded her of me, it made her feel weird, but that she's in a different place now. She's with someone else now but said that we should stay in touch.
We weren't friends before the 4 month thing so I don't really see her as just a friend because our lips locked every time we saw each other. Why would she text me still and ask how I'm doing? Like, and comment on my Facebook posts?
I chat with her when she messages me, and clearly we still enjoy talking to each other but it's easier for me not to message her just because of how strongly I really did feel. :s I don't really want to ignore her messages either though, but should I?
Most Helpful Girl
Well, first, I think you shouldve given a bit of a chase. Some girls, including me, want to see if you think we are worth a little bit of extra effort. She told you she was scared so that was an open invitation to soothe her fears and offer a slow building relationship that you both could ease into since you moved a little fast at first.
The occasional contact is normal, I think, because of how close it seems you guys were. Its not uncommon to want a connection with a person that made you feel so strongly, which might be why she wanted to keep in touch. I think you should let her know that she has other options (im not sure if you are getting into a different relationship or waiting for her.) that way, you won't have to do much filtering when you message her on fb. Don't ignore her messages because I'm hoping yall will get back together. :)
Now don't go thinking all of this is right or so informative because every girl isn't like this. Some girls may be talking to you because you had a quality they were looking for and found lacking in their relationship. She might be comparing you to him, which would explain the texting and messaging you. She might have doubted that you wanted to be with here after those first weeks meaning that she wasn't ready as a 'ill break up with you before you breakup with me' type thing. If you suggested waiting awhile for a relationship then she might think you just liked the physical stuff. If she suggested it, she mightve wanted to see if things were deeper than sex.
Hope I helped a bit. :)1