Online dating email fiasco?

An actual example of my attempt to engage a girl in a conversation.

Me: Hey I like your profile. I also see you're a fellow moviephile. What are some of your favorite movies?

Her: There are a lot I don't know where to begin lol.

Me:Oh I hear you lol. I don't think I'd be able to fit them all on one page! So I see you have a bachelors in studio art. Nice! That's a lot of different art forms. Which one would you say you're the best at? Also do you have a portfolio yet?

Her:Well I did art like 3 years ago so I don't really do any of that anymore.

Me:Lol I hear you! So where did you go to school at? Also what type of music do you listen to?

Her:I like everything but country.

Me:Lol yeah me too. Id have to say that my favorite genre though is alternative with a particular affection for chevelle and breaking benjamin, what are some of your favorite artists? So besides working out, shopping and watching movies which can be fun, do you have any other interests?

(She no longer wants to speak to me!)

So many of my attempts at trying to initiate a conversation with a woman get shot down like this. My question is should I just give up at life being that I have absolutely no other conceivable idea on how else to talk to a woman?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would chat off those questions, she either has no personality or no social skills. There is a reason some people use online dating. Try again with someone else. If she really has studied art shed be able to talk about it. And is not hard to put "what about you?" on the end , Jesus she sounds educationally challenged . Try another girl lmao


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What Girls Said 4

  • im really sorry if this upsets you, but to me it seems like your laying it on a bit thick.

    Dont ask so many questions! its really confusing and can come across kinda obssessive and sad (although they are harmless and have good intentions) usually its the other way around, where the girl talks too much. as well try and avoid the words ''also'' and ''lol'' alot. just be cool when typing or whatever. keep your replies short, those ones are much too long, containing too many questions especially with the replies she's giving you.

    its like your trying to talk and find out about everything at the same time and that's why your getting those kind of reples. stick to one subject at a time. leave breaks in the conversation before asking another question. your leaving NONE for HER to ask. ill try show you where you should have left it.

    ''Hey I like your profile. I also see you're a fellow moviephile.''

    her reply would have probably been on the lines of ''yeah I love them! what kind are you into?''

    ''I don't think I'd be able to fit them all on one page! So I see you have a bachelors in studio art. Nice! '' (maybe ask her favorite type of movies depending on her previous reply)

    Herself would have said probably the same ''Well I did art like 3 years ago so I don't really do any of that anymore.''

    you should have have said '' aw that's a shame :/.

    she would give a response and probably ask about your own studies

    ...And so on...

    i hope this answer is comprehendable :P I'm sorry I didn't intend for it to be this long! I hope it helps though and good luck!

    • I agree with this, exactly what I was going to say.

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    • ok . yeah talk about her interests but don't make it come across like youve looked her up alot. ask her things, even if you know them already from Facebook stalking or whatever :P the best thing you can do is maybe leave one question for something you saw on her profile, ask her that to open the conversation, but leave it at that like the example I gave above. don't act too keen or interested, make her come to you a little, just try and relax. do you talk the way your writing?

    • If you mean am I the same in person that I am in an online dating email...somewhat. I've kinda noticed from time to time that some girls are a bit more chatty in person than in an email. But getting to that point where I can meet them at the mall is apparently oohh such a big step and a huge commitment sometimes with most girls.

  • Too many questions... You don't need to ask a question in every message! Keep it at the first one, then start a conversation about that. Otherwise it sounds like a job interview!

    • That's my intention but its kind of hard when I get a response that consists of one or 2 words and especially when there's no questions.

    • for example... with the movie question, she gave a vague answer, so you could have followed up with, "Have you seen ____" yet? (insert a movie you like) you can probably narrow it down to the types of movies she watches, and you could even try and give her a recommendation.

  • Were you talking to me lol? JK but that would be exactly my answers if I was being nice but wasn't really all that into a guy.. Sorry dude.. She's prob not feeling it move on to the next one

    • Not feeling it on account of me shooting myself in the foot or just not feeling it do you think?

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    • The thing that I don't understand is why did she start talking to me if she wasn't feeling it. Why didn't she just do what most other girls do when they're not interested in talking to me and just delete my message with or even without reading it.

    • She probably liked something about you or a question that you asked.. There's guys that I've responded to that weren't exactly my type and I'm seeing if my taste has expanded.. 99% of the time it hasn't.. Don't take it to personally it's her just being indecisive.. Haven't you ever msg'd a girl that you weren't sure if you liked her or not or if she was your type but you were curious?

  • You're talking to the wrong girls

    Why should you give up? It's inline dating

    It going to happen

    A lot

    • That's what I thought but this is an almost all across the board kind of thing. I just need to know that I'm not just shooting myself in the foot.

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