Internet dating help for emotionally needy slightly cuckoo gal?

Ok so here it is...I am 200 lbs and that it is not a great thing in the superficial dating realm...also I am interesting age for a gal to try and date...I am on free sites and uss. I am hit up by pervs...One good guy emailed me well he seemed great...Ivy league ed., hot all American good looks...well one sorta our initial convo he says how is sex for over 35 women...are you more horny.I even respond and then he is like I am busy I have to work..brb.Probably means he was juggling other convos on a Fri night...I mean if he did have work why was he on this site and asking me about sex over 35...obviously he is cougar hunting right? Well I am needy of love I suppose...he emailed me his # and I called him the next day(yesterday) and then proceed to email him more and Facebook him...he friended me on there and I am waiting to be anyways...

no phone call or email back on Sat..(yesterday) by the way I had a rough terrible week and getting emailed by this dreamy CEO of a corp. who is 29 and a millionare...was exciting, I keep emailing him...I don't know a few times yesterday...between the site and my regular email and Facebook I think and at 9pm I email him Wanna f*** Ivy League Hottie...and then said that was a test ...I did not mean it and good luck. I have a way of doing this...sabotaging myself. I was drunk. I should have laid low. I had the rough week and I was being ignored I guess and then inundated with other guys emailing me really dirty their freakin' penis size when I say on my profile not looking for dirty talk...Well I am sure I scared off the hottie Ivy League guy...

I called him today and apologized for making an ass out of myself. I am devastated, mortified and embarrassed. I got soooo

excited over the prospect of him that I went overboard...and yeah I am ready to hear I am psycho. Maybe I am a little. I need love...

I was abused in my past terribly by my ex bf...and have had a rough rough time of it lately and it is not easy to date at 39...

let alone a chubby 39 and I am chubby not quite fat at 200 lbs...

I am a size 12-14...and look 30 lbs less than what I am...but I am chubby...I am not morbidly obese. Well I really f'ed up this time with this one guy who seemed like my dream man...except for the semi dirty talk and then flakiness. You have to understand this guy is hot, rich, invented some I-Phone app, and was funny,

travels to Virgin Islands...comes from a nice family, Cornell grad,

6'2 and other words right up my alley...I got overexcited and blew it...Help me and I am ready for truth...

Please do not be too brutal. I know I come off needy and obsessed. I have depression and PTSD over the abusive ex...

and lost my MOJO...and used to be considered a hottie...

Getting older and being alone is hard...Help please...

You have 500 characters left Anonymous

SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend Report


From Guys


From Girls


What G


Most Helpful Guy

  • Here's what others tell me ...
    Penpal in CA: went through a LOT of losers before finding one to marry = promising worker but ended up bumming around her house all day, no job; found #2 to marry with retirement benes but he soon became a bum, now looking to date outside the marriage; verge of divorce

    Penpal in NY: screwed her around and now she's done with them; views them as a site for guys wanting easy pickings sexually, posers and even planted, paid desirables; money down the drain. Having better luck with friends on the hunt in public places.

    Daughter: Thinks she found "the one" on line, even though she's shopped the local taverns w/friends

    Swim friend: going away party for her revealed she was tired of live-in Boyfriend dead end relationship so found retiring prof 3 states away that may not be athletic but is financially stable & will marry

    I have to suggest attending some club that is physical every day w/o exception since this is the main concern of your message. It is there that you will meet real people with similar goals that will appreciate you & your progress, many things in common to break the ice & so you can be yourself with little GAG advice/tips. These places can be like Gold's gym at first but may expand to dance, golf, tennis, etc.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Honestly I would believe you are chatting with rich Ivy League super hot guys when you meet them in person. In their expensive car.

  • There are LOTS of guys interested in dating a 39-year-old...but your weight is definitely a problem...I am sorry to be so blunt...but I would date almost ANY other woman than one who weighs 200 or more...I know that this is not an easy situation to change...but it CAN be changed...and that is the only barrier to dating lots of men...think about it...

  • Ehhhhh. Lose the weight. You know its a crutch and its holding you back.

    It sounds like you're trying to find happiness in others right now. Your first step should be to find happiness within yourself. Otherwise you'll keep trying ti find it in other people and you'll be disappointed.

    Lose the weight, do some things for yourself and you life will naturally improve.


What Girls Said 2

  • Honestly people are shallow... you should maybe lose some weight cause 200lbs doesn't seem healthy

  • WeLl for one thing, you don't sound too happy with yourself

    Would you be willing to date yourself? (thinking from a guys perspective)

    If not then you needa work on that

    Also confidence in yourself make people way more attractive than they might be if they didn't have confidence

    You also need to lose the expectations

    Sorry but a nice, attractive, ivy league, inventor, rich kinda guy probably isn't going to be the kind of guy you're going to get what with your age, weight, and attitude