How would you respond if you received this message?

Ok I was seeing this guy for 3 weeks to a month. He was really sweet; we were seeing each other 3 times a week with our dates ranging from 5-9 hours. We'd alway cuddle and hold hands and make out for hours on end. He even mentioned thingsf like taking me up to his cottage next summer and tell me how he wanted to show me around his home town.

He'd always kiss me on the forehead and the tip of me nose and do cute things like that. Sometimes we'd nod off in each others arms, though he'd never spend the night. He happened to fail a course and he was kicked out of his program and he was told he couldn't return until September.

He spent another week here and we still saw each other the same amount of times and still did all those cute things and he promised to visit me. We have hooked up everything but sex but he kept seeing me after that so I don't think he just wanted sexual things from me. When we did almost have sex once and when I said I wasn't ready he was totally understand. Still he stuck around. When he moved home (which is 5 hours away) we texted all day for a week and a have and then he started going M.I.A on me.

I don't know what to think. I still really like him and think about him all the time. I haven't heard from him since new year and I had to initiate the text. I don't know now he is considering joining the military.

Here is the text message that I'm thinking of sending him:

Hey Andrew,

I was thinking about you the other day and being a new year I want to make the most of it. I've been pretty honest with you and I hope you can return the favour. I like you a lot and often find myself missing you. I just feel like everything is up in the air I'm a little confused. I feel you've given me mixed signals talking about visits but stopped making any sincere effort to keep in touch so soon after you went home. Honestly, I'm pretty hurt and just makes me glad we never slept together. I know you are a great person, and that hurting me was never your intention. I just want to know if there's potential here to continue to get to know each other and see what happens. Or were we just friends with benefits and I should move on? I would just appreciate knowing where I stand with you.

Thoughts and the text/situation?


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  • My boyfriends name is Andrew! Okay I love your sense of directness. I am exactly the same way. The first part of your message I like but the second part seems like you might offend him "by saying your glad you didn't sleep together although I am glad you didn't because people do tend to regret it so smart move!) I would say for the second paragraph something more like " hey I like you a lot but I can't tell if you really like me. I am looking for a relationship (well that's what I got from it) so you want to know if you are serious. Maybe you're going through a hard time or something but this has been on my mind and I want to talk it out with you" hope that helps. You sound a lot like myself so I hope what I wrote makes sense. Good luck!

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