Text, after no contact

So I had a pretty horrible break up and we ended things after living together. we tried to work it out but things got out of hand and he even is in the process of moving an hour away from me as a result. after his request of no contact I refused to speak to him and be strong. today I get this message from him " just to make you feel better cause I known I left on a bitter note I am hurting badly and do miss you so this is going to be harder than I expected please don't reply back but I figured I would let you know that I do feel very empty and alone". what the hell was the point of that message? did he truly want me to respond? a cry out for help? or a sick way for him to gain control again. I'm not sure what to do, I haven't answered but I still want to know someones opinion on why he would even send this. Thanks!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Ha! That's so random I came across this. I am actually going through something quite similar. I will tell you this with confidence that part of it is manipulation. That doesn't mean he is lying about missing you and being sad. It means that he has had no contact with you at all. To him, you may have moved on, you may be sad, or you may have forgotten about him entirely. He doesn't know. Part, if not all of his goal was to get you thinking about him. Because if thoughts of him occupy your mind all of the time, you can't move on and he feels better. Its kind of like a dog that buries a bone. The dog buries it, neglects it and doesn't want it...until he thinks another dog does.

    My ex did it to me and I got him to finally admit that even though we werent talking, he would text me and stuff so that I would be thinking of him. And I know a ton of other guys that do it too. Sometimes they want the girl back, and sometimes they dont. And sometimes, they just want her to dwell and not move on and be as sad as they are. I would respond and let him know that either you guys are going to try and make some sort of friendship work, or he needs to be respectful and not message you anymore. Its not fair that he can text you whenever he wants, and then tell you not to message him. That's bull.


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