Guys why do you back off and act all cool?

This guy I like was texting me non stop before. Now he texts but it's like he's a "tough guy" and is acting all cold. He did say something mean the other night and it hurt my feelings. He immediately text a bunch of texts explaining himself and that he didn't mean to imply anything against me. He also said he was being a jerk. So I know he cares. I just don't know why he is acting this way.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He acts like a jerk and you like him, he's playing games already... Yeah that will end well.

    Like the other guy said if guys share feelings and sh*t they generally get friend zoned.

    Emotionless, stationary, rock = Win

    Guy who gives a sh*t about what you say = Fail.

    • So what do you suggest I do?

    • If he says things to the point of being very mean, I would forget it. Even when my entire week is f***ed up or someone I like is being bitchy I generally hold my tongue.

      If you still want to talk to him, intiiate some of the texts if you rarely or don't intiiate at all, flirt back if he's flirting.

    • He wasn't mean directly to me, just got carried away w his attitude. As I said, he panicked that he hurt me. Explained himself yet never exactly said sorty just a bunch of excuses and beating around the bush without saying sorry. Since then, he's been distant.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I noticed I do this too. For me It's usually because I have mixed feelings towards that person. One day ill treat them like a jewel. And the next day ill act like I don't really like them. Sorry if that made no sense, I'm pretty blazed.

    • So why act that way? Is it because you don't know what to do? Like if a guy says that he doesn't want a relationship, tells himself he doesn't and yet yearns for the girl. Is that the reason for the back and forth?

  • Because women respond better to that than when guys are straight forward about their interest in them.

  • Because if we don't you kick our balls and scream at us for being "creepy / needy / clingy."

    • ^ PREE MUCH

    • Show All
    • and here's the thing, if we didn't do that then women wouldn't be thinking about us, at least with negative publicity its better than NONE at all.

      As a man we have to do SOMETHING to stand out from all the other men who either act too nice or too much of a jerk.

      Being a LITTLE cold works. and that's why we do it.

      We know its not nice, but we have to do it or we dong get laid.

      Because that's the way women have trained us to behave.

    • for the most part women do things based on a feeling, men do things that work, or at least we try our best to.

      If that means being an a**hole to get laid or being a little bit of one, we will do it.

      Again, not because we want to be, but because we have to.

      Honestly most men would rather just walk up, say hi and be nice.

      But we all know that just doesn't work.

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