After dating 7 months he want to slow things down

Hi I am and dating this guy who I love and been together for 7 months we had been having few problems because he has online profiles looking for friends and fun and that is how I meet him we agree after been together for a month to delete those apps but one night we had an argument and he went on it again till this day I know he is having other guys because he said we are in a dating relationship and we can do all we want while we are not together lately has been cancel on my and been distace last night while he came over we had an argument and he said was better to slow things down we have a trip plan in 2 weeks he said not to cancel and go togther we agree to see each other twice a week for now and see what happen he will be busy the next 5 days with family and I don't mind at all my problem is that I really in love with him and I'm so hurt for this situation he say he loves me but not in love with me, also he said he does not want to be my boyfriend now because he is confuse and need to clear things out I need an advice I have no family in this country and is really hard for me to find a shoulder to cry on please tell me what do you think and help me out :-(.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Bro! I finally found a question about gays to answer! I'm gay by the way also, and I know how it feels. Matter of fact, it has literally been hard to find a physical shoulder to legitly cry on, but that's besides the point. Frankly, I would do what feels right. If he doesn't want to date you, sometimes people are just better off as friends. I mean, trust me, you can still love people as friends. If he's cheating on you, then that's a whole different animal. If you ever just want someone to talk to, just message me on this hard-to-use website. Thanks for reading!

    • Nice answer. But, this isn't just a gay question, is it? Happens to everyone.

    • Show All
    • Yep. I wasn't complaining, really. Sorry if it sounded that way. I do like your answer though. Very thoughtful.

    • That's fine!

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • Let him go, he's gone anyway. Be friends, but be cautious. Don't let him be telling you how your relationship is going to be. You can decide that.

  • Wow! That dude is out of this relationship and you know it. Know it! Anyone who tells you they love you but not in love with you is telling you it is over. He has point blank said he does not want to be your boyfriend...Why? He has others!

    Do you want to keep being played for a fool? Keep getting hurt? Keep getting your heart stomped? No. End it. YOU be the one to say goodbye. You can love someone & know it's time to go. He will never change, you know it.

    Your trip? He's not cancelling because he doesn't want to lose his $$$. He have 3 choices here: cance & lose your $$$, go & pretend everything is fine, or MY choice, go & go only as friends no matter what...friends only. Send him the message loud & clear that you have more respect for yourself than that. Do not let him use you or dictate to you how he will treat you. Step up.

    • Wow ! Thanks for your response everything you just said is what I need and I know you are right the trip has not been paid for so really there is there nothing to lose. Yesterday I did not reach out to him and this morning I was feeling good he text to say morning and we text just few times I know he is not the person for me to love I know that thanks for being blunt I need that

    • You're welcome. I am sorry this is happening to you. Why is it that we usually know these things but it takes someone else to give us the wake up call? I'm like that too, most of us are. Dang it! You take care.

What Guys Said 1

  • It would be best if you can enjoy your life at the moment. Go out to parks, clubs, bars, arcade, or recreational parks.

    After all, you'll be spending some intimate moments once your trip plan commences.