How do I date a man who is incredibly quiet?

So we have been in a relationship for about a month now. He's really quiet, and when we first met I thought it might just take some time for him to open up.

When are spending time together, we can go long periods of time without actually saying anything. It's never awkward, but I feel like I need more from him to get closer. I hate always having to initiate conversation.

He contacts me daily, usually we text a few times throughout the day, then when he is off work we will talk on the phone for while. But every time we text he just stops mid conversation. It worries me sometimes, especially since we usually talk at night. I sometimes worry that he is mad or something. I just wait for him to call or text me.

How do you date a person who is so quiet? Or is it even worth continuing?

We do have fun together though.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I am one of these guys although it seems I might talk a little more the he does. Its not that he doesn't want to talk or is mad. He's probably sitting there trying to think of something to talk about but cant. Some people just have a hard time trying to find or think of things to talk about.

    most females have an easy time coming up with topics because they naturally talk more. Where a guy may say 2000 word a day and girl will say 7000. Its just the way your brain works.

    You should give him some more time also. A month isn't a long time. Also try talking to him about your concern. Tell him you'd like to hear a little about his day and some of the things that happened in it. Just realize though, if he starts talking about stuff you have completely no interest in you need to act interested and pay attention. If you know he's really big into a certain sport try to get him to talk about that. Anyway, good luck with everything and hope everything works out for you two.


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What Guys Said 4

  • There is nothing wrong with pursuing a quiet guy. He might just be over thinking what a conversation is about. Just keep initiating the conversation eventually he will do his share as he becomes more comfortable around you. As somebody else pointed out, women are built physiologically for conversation their brain are so good at that they can even track PAST, PRESENT, FUTUR during a firestorm of words. As opposed to men's brain who would simply block out 2/3 of the tenses in order to track the conversation.

    What you might consider a short talk, he would consider a marathon. lol

  • That must get frustrating...just don't end things over it. He will most likely open up once he gets to know you even more. I know it usually takes less than a month to open up to someone, but trust me if you haven't known that person for very long and you're shy, it can take longer.

    You'll notice him slowly opening up.

  • Questions do a great job in opening up a person. Talk about his interest. If he loves basketball, try to talk about basketball all day, and what are your experiences about it.

    That should let his talkative side come to fire.

  • Try asking him some questions to keep him talking. I never know what to say around girls.


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