My boyfriend doesn't hang out with me!! What should I do?

We have only been together for a couple of months but we barely see each other. We are both in college and I live on campus, he lives off. He comes to my place about once a week and we usually spend friday night together but never saturday or sunday. His friends live like 30 seconds away from me and he is there almost every day but he rarely comes to see me. I mean if I ask him, he is happy to have me there but he never makes the suggestion himself, I usually make all of our plans. He sometimes goes to the bars and clubs too with the boys (I trust him though, he is not that type of guy) but I am underage so I can't go. Like tonight, I wanted him to spend the night and do stuff if ya know what I mean (we haven't done anything yet) but he went to the bars because his brother came to visit. He wants me to get a fake id or borrow someone else's but I don't know anyone who is older and looks like me. I mean maybe its just coincidences that our plans don't work out but its making me upset! What should I do?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Your man sees you at his convenience and now wants you to score an ID card so you can go out drinking with him and the gang on your designated date night. He doesn't seek any extra time with you and enjoys letting you insinuate yourself into his company. You're doing all the work, and that probably won't change until you make it so. You need to change the rules, see him on your terms, and start cutting him lose from his comfortable pattern. If this strategy seems too deliberate, then consider letting him go. You've relinquished all the power in your partnership to this man and it hasn't made you any happier. Really, woman, how much neglect can you stand?

    When a man really falls in love with you, he probably won't have the presence of mind to leave you alone while you clip your toenails. It's downright annoying at times. However, your love puppet can easily be trained to understand your boundaries while he applies himself to finding new ways to please you. Every woman deserves at least one maniacally attentive, hopeless lover during her college career. You just haven't found yours. The good news is that you'll stumble upon each other that much sooner once you decide that love doesn't work without devotion.

    Love is so much more than a simple declaration. In the case of young men searching for an elusive adulthood, judge true love as a verb, not a noun.

  • Assuming he's a good guy, the only reason why this happens is because he's trying to give you space. If he were to initiate a lot then he might come off as clingy and that's pretty bad for a guy. Him going out with his boys is also a sign letting you know that he can survive without you (don't take it the wrong way, though) but trust me when I say that at least half the time he's thinking about you when you both are not together.

    Again, this is assuming that he's a good guy and not some douchebag. If it is a problem, however, best you actually talk to him about this. And let him know that you won't see him as clingy if he initiates hanging out with you; in fact, you'd actually appreciate it because you enjoy being with him. Sometimes us guys need a little push to help us move things forward.


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