Ex-boyfriend says I'm selfish?

My ex-boyfriend and I broke up due to us being young and school getting in the way. We were together for 2+ years. He reassured me that it wasn't because he was interested in anyone else or anything like that, he just really wanted to focus on himself and he thought it was unfair to me. I cried and we kind of got into a little fight over it because when my feelings get hurt, I get mad and start saying things I don't mean. After this, he told me he'd always be there for me and we could always remain friends, and that I could go to him whenever I needed something.

A week after that, I got over my little crying/depressed phase and I texted him, and tried to initiate a conversation with him, but he seemed really uninterested in talking to me ingeneral. He seemed annoyed, so I didn't text him first after that because I felt as if I was burden or something. A few days later after this, he texted me and tried to initiate conversation, but for some reason I felt as if I couldn't talk to him. He seemed different and almost as if he wasn't even the same person. I didn't reply to him after a few messages back and forth.

A month's been by and I saw a few days ago that he's talking to another girl. I texted him and asked why, considering he broke up with me because he "couldn't handle a relationship at the moment", and he used a million excuses to try and change the subject. I told him I couldn't be friends with someone who I still had feelings for while they were talking to someone else because it put me into way too much emotional stress. He flipped out and told me I was selfish, and told me that I probably never cared for him in the first place if I can't even be friends with him.

I honestly don't understand how I am selfish. It hurts me too much to know that he threw away 2+ years of our lives just so that he could "be my friend" while talking to other girls. I feel as if he lied to me in the beginning and it was because he was interested in someone else, and I had started to become old news. I just feel really betrayed and I do love him, but knowing that he could just throw everything away so easily hurts me to the point where I can't even look at him or hear his voice. It just makes me so angry...

Am I wrong?


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What Girls Said 2

  • No, you aren't wrong. However, he has decided what he wants, and you need to do the same. If you can't be friends with him, then don't. I think that's probably the best thing to do anyway. Doesn't really sound like he's actually interested in being a good friend.

  • No you're not. You have total rights to be upset at him behavior. The fact is he broke up with you and and he's talking to other girls and he expects you to treat him as though he didn't do anything and then to top it off he calls you selfish when you're stopping yourself from getting even more hurt. Face it: the guy's a jackass.

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