My first date ...I'm so nervous

Bit of context; I go to an all boys school, and might never see this girl again if this goes pear shaped...

I don't have her number yet , I asked her out over Facebook, but I don't really know if its a date or we're just meeting as friends (I'm happy either way tbh)

My biggest worry is that things will get awkward or something so she doesn't want to meet again, this will basically be my only chance to ensure we see each other again (and I would like to).

Should I offer to pay? Should I try to get her number (not if it goes badly obvs)

I like her alot, so if she feels the same way it will be fine, but there was a bit of a time lapse between her seeing my message and her responding (im probably over thinking that aren't I)..

...and breath

Change of plans: I'm walking her dog with her. This gives me fewer opportunities to make clear its a date, not just hanging out...But she did contact me first, so she is at least a little bit interested =)
So it wasn't really a date, but it went okay anyways. Se seems to have a lot going on in her life (e.g a much more packed social life than mine) so I will wait a week or maybe two to contact her unless something specific comes up.


Most Helpful Girl

  • First of all, take a deep breath and try to relax. Just be yourself! Unless you're a psycho who is planning on stalking her or something, then don't be yourself please. Just think of it as a friendly meeting up with someone, don't put too much pressure on it. Don't think of it as your only chance, think of it as a chance. Take her someplace fun, maybe bowling or a walk in the park or something, or ask her what she fancies doing. Try to get to know her, talk about TV shows, hobbies, animals, school, how everything is at home, what kind of movies she likes, maybe some people you both know, ...

    You could offer to pay, since you invited her and if you pay it'll seem more like a date, or if not we'll probably get a question here stating a guy paid for a night out and she wonders if it's a date.

    At the end of the date, if you don't walk her home, ask her if she'll text you when she gets home (I always like it when a guy asks me that if he can't walk/drive me home, so it shows he cares), then the problem of the number will emerge and then you'll say: "here's my number, text me when you get home safely ok?".

    Be a gentleman, listen to her, make some jokes, be a bit silly, but maybe open a door for her, let her go first, ... Stuff like that :)

    Just relax, be yourself and try to have a good time. Don't force yourself to be funny, that won't work. Don't put too much pressure on it or you'll feel stressed and forced to be someone you're not.

    Good luck!

    • Thank you so much for the extended answer, I really appreciate it.

      We were going to go to a cafe to sit and chat, will walk with her to and from her house. In terms of actually offering to pay, shall I just ask what she wants while I'm at the til with my money out to make it clear I'm paying?

      Thing is, if she didn't want it to be a date then that would make the rest of the 'date' awkward...I will probs ask for her number as I leave her at her house.

      And yeah I do need to relax somewhat

    • Show All
    • I did text her that a little while after we hung out, but she told me she as struggling to make time for an old friend of hers so I don't want to force her to make time for me .

    • Oh OK, that makes sense. Just don't wait two weeks to talk to her, randomly ask her how she's doing. Just to make sure you stay on her mind ^^

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 1

  • About paying, offer to pay.

    If she wants to pay hers, let her pay it.

    About getting her number, try getting it as you part ways.