Why is there no response?

I have been on this dating site for a while and have emailed at least 60 women. I finally have received an email back, but after I responded I haven't heard anything back and it has been several days. I'm sure she has seen the message because the website shows me that she is online for chat, however, I don't overstep that boundary of being the 'weird' guy sensing multiple messages of chat requests. I just don't understand why I have such a hard time trying to get a woman to talk to me. I am on dating sites because I don't approach women in public and haven't ever; I'm very intimidated by women and extremely shy. This has been an on going battle trying to get responses from women online, and nothing I do (updating profiles, adding pics) seems to help. Last time I spoke to a women was almost a year ago and she talked to me...Didn't last very long at all. Why don't I get responses from women? I spend the time to write a good profile and put photos up; they aren't shirtless ones, or photos with me and other women, I try to smile in them. I just don't get it. Need help!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Why is there no response?

    Most likely because you're messaging gals that aren't attracted to you.

    Why don't I get responses from women?

    In my opinion it depends on your height and what gals you're messaging:

    - are they younger than you..if so you have competition from multiple age ranges

    - are they more attractive than you...if so you they may not see a reason to go for 'lower'

    • Just so that I understand, women want someone tall? That his mean that I won't find anyone ever? I have emailed at least 60 very different women, from ages 28 - 34 (I'm 32). how is one to build self-esteem and confidence when women won't give you a chance? Once again I'm just trying to understand this... Are saying that I won't have an attractive woman be interested in me? Do I have to settle for someone I don't fin attractive and tha doesn't share any interests?

    • Show All
    • I do contact the girls that are less attractive just as much as those girls who are very attractive. It seems as if you think that people are forced to settle for something because they will never do better. It also seems that you use the word 'attraction' as a means to justify the sole reason why I don't get a response. I know I'm not that great looking, but I want to believe that all women aren't that shallow and will only date a guy because they have a great body, perfect hair and smile.

    • It seems you lack reading comprehension. I said 'many people' not 'people' I'm not talking about people in general. Nowhere did I state any reason for settling so how did you get this "because they will never do better" bit? o.O

      I'm not justifying I'm giving a likely explanation. For gals attraction can be nonphysical things so it may be your profile however it's telling how to you gal not responding equals her wanting perfection or close to perfection.

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What Girls Said 2

  • You're height is fine. However, I think it is fairly accurate to say that women tend to prefer men taller than them. We're hard wired that way. If that is your pic, you're not a bad looking guy. You do need to exude more confidence though. Advice, change your selection to shorter women stick with the 5'5" and shorter range if you have the option to restrict to height. As for income, leave it out. If a woman is caught up on what you make, she's shallow and not worth the effort!

  • Being intimidated by women is something you need to work on and being online isn't going to help. A woman is still going to glean that from your messages and your profile. Also, what do you have for your height and income? Sorry to be shallow, but just like men are weeding women out by their pictures, women are doing the same thing.

    • I'm short, 5'4" and my income isn't publicly shown, but I selected the $35,000 - $50,000 per year option (about $38,000). Last time I talked to a woman and asked her out was in 1998 and she said no. Does being short automatically disqualify me from being able to date pretty women? Are women that shallow that if a nice guy, who's a honest, hard working man, who doesn't make much money would like to talk or ask them on a date they will say 'no'? I would like to believe that, but I don't know.

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    • No, I don't expect a woman to date someone based solely on personality because the physical attraction should be there to, however, what I am saying is that I would like to date a woman I think is pretty and shares some of the same interests. I don't think that's being unfair or shallow of me. I wold expect the same from a woman, though I am confused why out of 60 women, who are very different from height, body, interests, careers, not one of them would like to talk.

    • You likely only messaged women out of your league, or they would've liked to talk.

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