How rude is this text?

So I was supposed to go on a (first) date with this guy. However, he sent me a text saying we have to " reschedule to another day " because he's taking off to wherever with his friends and he won't be back until X day. No apology, nothing.

But he went into details as to why he was taking off (he's got a sudden job break bla bla).

I still haven't responded to his text. But I want to find something that screams :

- I don't like to be messed with.

- I'm not a doormat

- Thanks for being so rude

- I couldn't care less why you had to cancel

- (And probably) Have a nice life

I'm not sure I should write him off, but I find his behavior a tiny bit rude. He could have come up with a more respectful excuse especially as he's the one who has been insisting on setting up this stupid date. Thankfully, the cancellation wasn't last minute.

What can I send him as a response?

Thanks ;)

Oh. And I forgot to mention he had the guts to end his text with a smiley face.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sudden job break is a lie, it's to legitimize his rude behavior to an acceptable standard.

    Notice that he gave you a command, instead of a statement or apology. And specifically in a manner which benefits him.

    This guy is pro. Gimme his number, I wanna get tips from the bro.

    Must of learned his texting from a pick up artist book.

    He's displayed that he is more important than you, his friends are higher priority than you, given you an order which favors him only while making him dominant at the same time. He threw the ball in your court to see how'd you respond. How you respond indicates your tolerance of order, and he will gauge according.

    A lot of girls fall for this subtle, yet obvious manipulation tactic.

    I believe manipulation like this is sick. Personally..

    • I agree. He's pretty damn good. I somehow figured he's kind of a pro when it comes to dating. Everything he does seems to be caculated properly. And I completely agree on the fact that his messages puts him in a dominant position. That's exactly what crossed my mind at first. He was like " I need to reschedule " - Like he upholds some kind of authority and everything has to go according to his plans.

      How should I behave in your opinion?

    • Show All
    • “When you begin a journey of revenge, start by digging two graves: one for your enemy, and one for yourself.”

      I can't help you. It would violate the Terms of Services on this site.

      You can choose to do whatever you want, but you cannot choose the consequences of your actions. Remember that.

    • Don't worry, I wasn't looking for anything bad. I just wanted to know if I should ignore him or if I should send him a mean text. That's all.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • How rude is it? Well, pretty consarned rude! As you say, he offers no explanation or excuse why his friends are more important than his time with you. It would be one thing if you had been the one to set this up..but as you say, it was his idea in the first place.

    Tell him somethng like, "I am not a pawn you can move around. This message was really insulting. Don't bother to reschedule. Ever. It's clear I'm not important enough to treat with respect.



    • Update: Nothing more grating than a smiley face after someone has insulted you!

      How about a retching icon back?

  • I think the best answer would be no answer really...make him realize he f***ed up.

  • Don't respond to his text. Let him know of the discomfort he had caused you.


What Girls Said 2

  • Well,I find his very casual response VERY rude for someone he is supposedly interested in...or is he?

    Secondly,the BEST response over words is to completely IGNORE him. I said this on another thread,but ignoring someone shows them that you think they are NOTHING.I would put money on it that if you said nothing at all,he would most likely be hounding YOU down.But,the early stages of anything can show you what that person will be like down the road...and he sounds like he might be a douche.

    Imo,actions speak so much louder than anything you can say NOTHING.

    Good luck.

  • I handle things differently.

    I wouldn't be rude back, because it won't accomplish anything. I'd just say, "Okay, have fun." But I'd never agree to go out with him again. He blew you off for a reason, and being rude will only make him feel better about blowing you off.