Men, should I be concerned or is it typical male behavior?

So to keep this short but sweet. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years. One day he left his cell phone at home while he went to the store, he got a phone call and a text message. The text was from a girl whom he briefly dated before me. The text said "I haven't talked to you in 2 months" Curiosity got the better of me and I quickly went through his texts (I know, I know bad thing to do) but in my defense that was the first and only time I did that. Anyways, I saw some flirty text messages, nothing X-rated at least none that I saw. I know he loves me and we are planning a future together. My thing is why do you men flirt even when you're in love or in a relationship? You flirt even when the girls are nothing to write home about. Is it an ego boost or what? I know he is human, and my mother chalked it up to a "typical male behavior" My boyfriend didn't get too into them, but he did nothing to stop them. They kind of hurt my feelings.


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What Guys Said 2

  • I don't know what kind of flirting you're talking about, so I don't know for sure.

    I can say this, though: I'm a natural flirt. I don't even think about it, and I know it's a little bad. It's just the way I talk, and move, it's always a little flirty, and I do it with everyone. But while it's basically unconscious, I at least have enough common sense to not go to far. Like it's never straight up sexual. More just complimentary, and minor suggestion. Maybe something like calling someone "beautiful", "sexy", "gorgeous" or something to that effect as a pet name. (For example "Hello, gorgeous.") Furthermore I kinda do it to everyone, regardless of gender. Fortunately my girlfriend knows me better.

    So yeah, he could be like me, he could be just a natural flirt.

    I know how this is going to sound, but I think you should talk to him about it. If this is making you think twice, or it's got you really uncomfortable, I think you should probably talk to him about it, and just make sure. Otherwise your options are drop the whole thing, and get over it, or drop him as a boyfriend, and find a guy you feel you can trust better than that.

    Best of luck.

  • Men and women flirt all the time. Flirting makes both people feel better about themselves. There is just friendly fun flirting and there is flirting that gets people into trouble. If it sounded innocent then it is likely just typical human behavior.

    I love to flirt, but it is all very innocent, most of the girls I go out with say the same thing. I could flirt with an old woman and make her smile, but it doesn't mean my girlfriend would have to worry about me cheating on her with an old lady.


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