How can I avoid awkwardness on a date?

I met this guy online and meeting him for coffee tomorrow.

I'm 23 never kissed a guy, and only had three first dates all from an online dating site.

and this has occured before I'll list according the people

Jake- was very awkward to begin with. told me off during the date like you "should accept another offer" when I told him about some weird guy msging. Told me I was too extrovert for him. And kept asking me when I was going to meet my friend and it was getting late. I kept trying to make the conversation go, as it was my first date really ever...and he just made it hard. I shook hands with him at the end of the date lol Then for the rest of the semester I saw him on the express train to my university every morning...yay more awkwardness for me.

Alex- He was shorter than I realized he would be and the day of he (before the date) sent me a few body shot and asked me if I liked them. He was going to university overseas after the summer ended and I felt like he was only looking for a hookup. I hugged him at the end of the date and went on my way as saying my bus was leaving soon. He said he would walk me to the station (15 min away) I said its okay its kind of far.

Matt- He was nice at first. And then after he kept talking I was yawning and drinking coffee. Wasn't really interested I guess it showed because I kept looking elsewhere when he was talking. In the beginning of the date he suggested we go out for a walk after coffee..and it was raining lol and after the date he just goes

"see you around".

I don't think I was particularly attracted to any of them, maybe that's why the dates were so bad. I felt awkward even when I wasn't attracted, a) kept being on my phone during the date- I was nervous-only first two dates listed though

b) last date as I reached for coffee, my hand would shake even though I FELT NOTHING for the guy.

Any ways to make myself less nervous and less awkward during the date, I have like no experience and my friend is telling me to go on this date with the new guy because he seems like someone I would like. He's intelligent, athletic and cute. And now I'm also second guessing myself thinking I'm not good enough lol

This date didn't work out and the guy had no interest in me.

He even checked his watch twice during the date and asked when I was going to meet my friends. I dragged the date on which I shouldn't have even though he was kind of boring but he was good looking. I can't date to safe my life.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You have to realize that you are awesome for just being you and that the person you are on the date with should just be happy that you have taken time out of your life to include them. I used to be just as nervous dating as you are, but it is just a date. You are just getting to know someone to see if you are compatible. The other person is going to have the same nerves as you. You sound like a great person, stop doubting yourself and just be true yourself. A woman that sticks to her values and won't settle is irresistible. You are going to go through a lot of toads until you find your prince.

    • How soon into the date did he check his watch? What did you guys do for the date?

    • Show All
    • I don't think its working out because a) I was inexperienced and shy with guys in general first b) Now I'm more comfortable with guys, have more guy friends just to hangout with. But now that I've started "dating" I don't really know why. I think guys that I'm attracted to (certain types of white guys) are not attracted back to me (light-skinned Indian girl). The area I grew up in is pretty diverse so its not a cultural thing preventing them from dating me but rather they see me and don't like me

    • or aren't attracted. I think white guys in general like more stick figures and blonds. That's they type of girls I see guys (I'm attracted to) with. I know I can never be a stick figure and blond so I'm not their type so just makes me say fml lol

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • You may already be meeting him now. In retrospect, your dates don't sound very unusual. I don't think you did anything wrong, although being on the phone is not advisable. Your reactions seem normal enough given the circumstances. You really shouldn't feel there is anything wrong with you or that these experiences reflect on you somehow. Most people don't click and there's nothing wrong with that. You need a lot more experience with this before you need to start looking for patterns or problems. You will learn more about dating from experiencing them than from any other source. Awkwardness is very normal, probably more so when the dates go badly. And many people get very nervous when dates go well, so don't freak out if that happens on a good date.

    • If you found him boring, than the quality of the date doesn't reflect your dating skills. I assume you would do much better if the two of you were genuinely interested in each other.

  • dont try to plan out anything and do script it just go with the flow and try to be yourself. Don't act desperate to get him to be your boyfriend and do not pretend to be a person you are not. You can show him whom ever but the real you will come out eventually. Try to have fun and take it as a learning experience if nothing else.


What Girls Said 1

  • well stop over thinking stuff. try to think how great you are and that you shouldn't change for a guy to like you becasue it never works out.

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