Have you ever read a message and been upset with what you found?

Have you ever read a message that you shoudln'tve like a text or email or whatever that you shouldnt've read?And you found something that upset you?What did you do, did you talk to the person about it or did you bury it and not say anything? I know it is very wrong but I read a message my boyfriend had sent to this girl he slept with a while back, he said he wonders about her sometimes and hopes she is okay, he also said sorry that he had to block her because of me(I never even asked him too). He still said that he is with me and he also said she can come down to the bar with him and his friends. That part really upset me, I read this over 7 months ago and I've tried to let it go because I feel like he wouldn't cheat but it still worries me and I can't seem to let go, people tell me to tell him but I just can't do it, I know how it will end. I know I made a mistake by reading it and I have noticed my behavior towards him is a bit different. Is it possible to let something like this go?She hadn't replied back to him either and she did have a boyfriend at the time he messaged her. She is from his home town(in a different country) too.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I read a conversation my boyfriend had with a girl-friend who lives across the continent. He said rude things about me such as I am not that pretty and he's not sure if he wants to be with me (we were together 1.5 years at that point). Seriously don't know why all that was said since he never acted that way before. He was sleeping and I was sitting there crying reading it, I woke him up and told him I don't want to be with him and it's over. Things are better since then and he said he wasn't thinking properly. Still to this day boggles my mind but it's in the past.

    If she didn't respond back, it was 7 months ago and nothing bad has happened since, then try and leave it alone. Trust me, he will get upset you were snooping and bringing this up now rather than 7 months ago.

    The only reason it worked in my favor is because he really did say things out of the ordinary he knew was wrong.

    • It hurts doesn't it finding something like that, well I hope your boyfriend learnt his lesson lol. Well it was written like a year ago but I found it about 7 months ago. And he was in his hometown when he sent it,so I don't know if they ended up meeting up after he sent the message seeing as she hadn't replied, but it also makes me think, what were his intentions. It's the uncertainty that kills me. I wish I could let something like this go, but it's so hard

    • It really does hurt. I honestly have really horrible trust issues. Even to this day, I unfortunately check his messages. I shouldn't, I feel bad, but I am working on my trust issues. That's all I can do.

      Are you in a long distance relationship? You were mentioning " his hometown". Were you guys in a relationship one year ago when he sent the message? Or was it an "on-off" type of thing? I completely hate uncertainty too.

    • You and I are very similar :(. It sucks so bad and insecurity really does effect your relationship my boyfriend gets to the point now he gets angry because I am so insecure. Well I hope that's the reason he gets angry, not that he has done something. My boyfriend is from another country but has been living over in my country for a few years and we met here within that time, but he went and visited his country a year ago, when he messaged her. I noticed he sometimes looks at her Facebook too :(

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • I don't go poking around others' things/profiles or emails. it's their private life and if they want to share something with me they'll let me know.

  • No, never happened to me. It's always in the form of calls.


What Girls Said 3

  • You will always go around hanging out with him with the uncertainty that he might be thinking about this girl , or doing something that would upset you. Since you have done something ethically wrong you cannot ask him about the girl, in the end it will eat you up inside.You have to admit to what you did and tell him all about it. Because appearently you can't get rid of the wishful thinking and scenarios in your head. You should talk to him and be prepared for how he might respond to that.

    • I've thought about talking too him about it but I just can't :/

    • Show All
    • It's hard because I wouldn't know if he was up to something see as he wasn't even in the same country, so it is hard to know. It's hard to know what his intentions were and I guess I need to find a way to let go seeing as I won't talk to him about it, I'm scared of what he would say and how angry he would get. Ah well..

    • :( I hope you can figure out a way. I wish somehow you could find out what he did or did not without his knowledge of your actions.

  • no, that is why I don't read anything I don't have to

  • i don't read anything that is not mine

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