Hey all, I'll try to keep this story short so it's easy to follow. I realize everyone on GaG.com could write novels to summarize their questions to get to their point. I'm semi new here, this is my first question but I've been answering some of yours with my opions. Here goes...
-I met a woman about 2 years ago and we fell in love
-After dating her for about 4/5 months, she moved out of state verrry far away. We lost contact ( long story )
-She moved back to the state about 5 months ago and contacted me
Things were great at first. We talked all day long from the moment we waked up until we went to bed through all means of communication. It's hard to see her because we live about 45 minutes apart, she has kids that go to bed late, and wake up early and she lives with her parents, so it's hard for her to come to my apt. It's hard to see her as much as I'd like.
We've had our rocky moments but as of lately I feel like I wasn't really wanted anymore or needed by her. We started talking less, hours would go by before messages were responded to. I started seeing her less.
Instead of trying to talk to her about it, I decided to not talk to her one day. that turned into 3 or 4 days of me ignoring her. I don't know what I was thinking but I was hoping that maybe she'd blow up my phone or tell me she missed me or whatever. I did get a few texts and phone calls from her but nothing major.
Anyway I hate myself for that. We've talked since then but things are just different now. She doesn't respond to my texts much, or phone calls. We talk on the computer sometimes but even then it's a lot of "dry" conversation. Then again, what do I expect? I deserved this.
I can't believe I did that. I'm kicking myself, I'm extremely upset. She told me that during that time I ignored her she was having trouble sleeping and right before that she was put on meds for anxiety. She told me she REALLY needed me and I wasn't there. That crushed me.
So that's it huh? Not really anyway to fix that, is there? I wanna see what you guys have to say.
At this point I don't know what I should be doing. Should I keep sending her simple messges like that so she knows I'm thinking about her and cares? Or should I withdraw a little. I don't want to annoy or smother her and turn her off
What would you do in my situation?
Most Helpful Guy
it sounds to me that the relationship has too many obstacles for success. Between the distance, life circumstances, etc. it seems like you too are fighting for something that might not be won.
It's like the Vietnam war or something. Even when given better circumstances (like living closer) it seems that there are still many obstacles that are perhaps too big to overcome.
I hate to say it but I think you should move on. Perhaps if the fates destine it circumstances will change but as it is it seems like you two are fighting for something that is a difficult to win and as there are so many other things going on in your lives it's hard to manage a complicated relationship and deal with everything else without slacking and not putting 100% into everything1