It seems my EX has reduced me to a texting buddy..... *again*

My EX and I have been on speaking terms for the past two weeks, and we both agreed to work on our relationship. Everything has been great between us. He made it seem like he had changed and that this time around things would be good. He would call me every morning or send me little love texts calling me princess, and the pet name he gave me when we were dating. He lavished me in attention and affection like he use to, and well... it felt really good coming from him since he was my first love.

Now I don't know if this is a good thing or bad, but since we've been talking he and I had sex twice. I was reluctant at first, but one night we were talking about old times.. and I felt so connected to him, so I gave in. We both agreed that it was something we hadn't felt in months and it just felt right.

Skip a few days later he tries again to have sex with me, a few more times, but I was really sick so I said no. Pretty much after that, I don't know if I hurt his feelings, but he became rather distant. He stopped being affectionate and every time we spoke he just didn't seem like he had any life in him. His texts changed as well, he'd make up excuses to call me later,and whatever. He doesn't even talk about getting back with me anymore either.

It hurt me alot... So I started to extract my emotions from him once again, just in case he tries something funny, which he notices and becomes irritated by it.

So he called me and said. "I don't want you to think that I'm ignoring you/avoiding you or anything, you do know texting is still a form of talking right?"

Of course it is, to someone you rarely talk to on the phone. I know that guys and gals need their space and I'm trying, and willing to give him the space, but its like... he's distancing himself from me, but gets mad when I distance myself from him. This has happened before, which resulted in a one-sided relationship where I had to do everything! I'm sick of trying with him, if all he's gonna do is loose interest the moment I don't or can't be intimate.

Should I just let it go and move on? I know it sounds stupid, but it makes me feel terrible when we were talking on the daily, to just random half ass texts messages.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Yeah, I'm thinking you should just give up on this guy. Let it go and move on. Remember he's your ex for a reason, and that even if you get back together, it will never be the same. It will never be as good as it was, let alone better. It ended for a reason. You can stay friends, you can be friends with benefits, but don't delude yourself into thinking it'll ever be much more than that.

    This guy became friends with you, then he got sex, and I'm thinking in this case that's what he was mostly interested in, more than anything else. Sure the other stuff may have been good, but I get the impression it's the sex that was keeping him around. Even if it wasn't, I'm pretty sure you hurt his feelings all those times you shot him down.

    Nah. I think a text buddy, and occasional FWB is the best you're going to get from him. I would advise you stop trying for anything more. If you do get to be his "friend" again, just know that this pattern is likely to repeat, and you can either accept it, and take it for what it is, or just end it all completely, but don't be surprised if you stick around and everything you described happens all over again.

    I say move on, or accept this pattern for what it is.

    Your choice.

    • Sorry for the lateness, but yes you are right. :)

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What Guys Said 2

  • I had a similar situation going on with my ex. Felt very one sided (me doing all the texting until I stopped all together) and so we decided to take a break. Little did I know, that while we were working on it and starting to talk again, she was already dating someone else. She would still text me saying she missed me (obviously as a backup).

    I am trully sorry to say, but you should get out before you get hurt even more. =(

    PS: Pardon any grammatical/spelling mistakes, English is my second language.

  • He puts the EX in TexT!


What Girls Said 2

  • Forget him.

  • The best thing to do is move on.