He is scared he is a rebound. How do I assure him that he is not?

Only time will tell, or will it?

I just got out of a three year relationship with a not so nice guy. He was a great person just not a good boyfriend.

However, I feel I am falling for this new guy in some of my college classes. I was still with my bad boyfriend when I met him but we agreed to take things slow and make sure I was broken up before anything happened.

Okay, new guy and I have been doing some heavy flirting and spending pretty much all our free-time together. We just went on our first date this past weekend and I had so much fun. I haven't had that much fun in a while. I honestly never thought I would have this much fun with a member of the opposite sex.

That is great but this guy is a little reluctant. He has told me honestly that he likes me, loves my company, and we have loads in common but he does not want to be the rebound guy. He sees this as a potential long-term relationship and doesn't want to jeopardize anything. I can tell he is trying to be nonchalant about the whole thing but at the same time I know he is interested. In fact, last night I said to him that he confuses me greatly and I need to know his intentions. He told me that his intentions were to see how it goes because he wants us to get to know each other so we can fully judge the situation.

My question is this: How can I assure him that he is not a rebound. I am over my ex (really!) and I am ready to take things slow but I do want something!

I asked him last night if I can date other people and he said, "Sure! But I do want to know if they are as cute and funny as I am !" lol

My thing is, I don't want to date anyone else. But it got me thinking. Maybe I need to go out on other dates to show that he is not a rebound guy?!? I don't want to make him jealous but I want to show him that he is the one I want! Yes, I have told him this but he is very cautious- actually a quality I admire in him.

Please help, I don't want to screw this up and I see a future with him.

Thank you in advance for your advise.


Most Helpful Guy

  • There is nothing you really can do in my opinion. He has it in his head that he is the rebound guy. And there isn't a thing you can really do to get that out of his mind besides show him by dating someone else first.

    • Well he said he just wants to be sure he's not the rebound. He wants to take it very slow- something I am not used to at all.

    • Sometimes it's a good idea to take it slow, it gives you time to get to know each other before things get complicated IE-sex-emotional commitment-etc.

      So yeah I think it's a good idea for you to take it slow after you just got out of a relationship.

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