How am I doing compared to others?

So I've been online dating for about 10 months. In that time I have been on 4 dates but no second dates. I'm not an aggressive dater in that I message selectively so that explains somewhat the low number of dates. Quality rather than quantity...

My first ever date was amazing but she politely said it's not going to work due to distance which was nice that she didn't string me along.

2nd was nice and wanted a second date but I felt no chemistry.

3rd was nice and said she would definitely go on a second date and even said she would thing of a place to go. Then I heard nothing from here.

4th was what I would describe as my perfect girl. Everything was so amazing about her and we had such similar backgrounds and interests. The date was very good but she said she was busy the next couple of weekends so I said let me know when you are free and we can sort something, to which she said OK. It might work out or it might not but she was the nearest to love at first sight I have got.

All 4 dates were with really nice girls that were my type and I have had a nice time on each of them. None have gone to a second date so far but I'm happy that at least the ones I have been on have been with people I like so hopefully one that likes me will come along. None of the dates have been hard in any way. Conversation and atmosphere has always been relaxed and easy.

So how am I doing compared to other guys?

I am getting a bit frustrated with meeting amazing girls and having what seems amazing dates but no second dates.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Meeting anyone in person is an accomplishment because most girls are flakey as hell with online dating and will setup meets and stand people up all the time. So you definitely must be doing something right if they're at least meeting you in person.

    I've met tons of girls online but we're talking over the course of literally years. Most girls I've talking to hate POF like mad and say they get 50 hookup requests a day. Thing is, a lot of girls are getting off the to attention with no intention to meet. Also, I don't recommend paid sites, so stick with the free ones. I have a profile well written with photos and I have a good physique compared to the average joe and I've literally had one date from my 6th month term and they're gonna give me a free 6 months. I've met a buncha girls from the free ones so I will definitely never recommend paid sites unless you're going on one of the religious only ones.


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What Guys Said 2

  • I honestly don't know what metric to measure success by. I messaged 40+ women on POF, received 4 responses, only two of which were more than a few lines long. Of those two, one hit it off with me very well - we've been on two dates already and have plans for a 3rd and maybe 4th... I was on POF for around a month. I was planning to stop using it for a while soon, but this woman that contacted me back kept me on a few more days. I do know that we never ever would have met without the site though - so take from that what you will. In answer to your question... I don't know. The dating sites are very one-way it seems - the guys almost always do the messaging and hoping for a response... which is very frustrating.

  • You are doing well. 4/4

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