Okay so I need advice.
I'm a high school student and I like someone. He and I have been hanging out quite frequently lately. We want to hang out again tomorrow, but we would be alone (obviously with my family around in the house and we would be in the living room). It sounds like no big deal but every time we hung out prior to, we were with other people.
My father treats me as if I am 12, though. He said that I'm just a kid and I can start dating once I'm in college. He started dating at 13. My mother started at 14. The guy and I would probably only be playing video games and it would be completely innocent. I don't understand why he's so against me being alone in an open area with the opposite sex. He's acting as though the guy wants to get into my pants and it offends me that my dad:
1) Thinks I'm stupid enough to do that at my age
and 2) thinks that every guy is a dog.
Not to mention he's unfair.
This other guy (who I only see as a friend) is allowed to come and go as he pleases. He likes me, makes perverted comments and basically tries to cuddle with me even though I stop him, but he LOOKS wimpy so my dad doesn't see this. Where as the guy I actually do like is completely respectful, makes playing teasing comments and the most we've done is sit on the couch and share a blanket (sharing it across our laps, too. not even around the shoulders)
WHY IS HE ACTING LIKE THIS?
WHAT DO I DO TO GET IT THROUGH HIS HEAD THAT IT COMPLETELY NORMAL FOR ME TO HANG OUT WITH A GUY THAT I LIKE?
HOW TO I GET HIM TO UNDERSTAND THAT THE GUY AND I ARE BEING COMPLETELY INNOCENT?
Most Helpful Girl
This is normal. Your dad hasn't quite gotten used to the idea of you dating yet, so this transition phase will be very annoying for you. He's just being overprotective and trying to hold on to his little girl. But don't worry, he'll get used to the idea in a few years.
I know you know you're not stupid enough to do anything with a boy right now, but your dad doesn't know that. My guess is that he's suspicious of teenage boys because he WAS once a teenage boy. In his mind, he's protecting you against his past self, who more than likely manipulated naive teenage girls into his pants once or twice.
My advice is to approach him as calmly and maturely as you can. Tell him that this boy is a good student (assuming he is), that he treats you very respectfully, and that all you want to do is play video games. Add that you respect your body enough to not do anything stupid at your age, and invite your dad to join you in the living room whenever he wants (it's annoying, but you want him to trust you).
Also, avoid saying it's not fair and that they both started dating younger than you are now. Bottom line is they're your parents and they're just looking out for your best interests, even if that means they're overprotective every once in a while. The only way you'll get them to relax is to show them you're smarter and more mature than the average 16 year old girl.1