Girls, Are you not dating because of previous bad dating experiences?

Girls , Are there any off you not dating like you should because of previous bad dates , experiences etc and don't want that again ?. So you avoid dates , like your too busy, Don't go out etc


Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes.

    I had a string of really bad relationships that basically left a horrible taste in my mouth regarding relationships.

    It's been well over 2 years since my last relationship ended badly and I still don't really want to get back out there yet.

    I have my moments when I feel lonely and want someone to cuddle with or hang out with, and of course sex, but really, I've been much happier not dating than I ever was while I was dating. I was pretty miserable, actually. Everything about me made me miserable, my boyfriends, myself, the circumstances of it all... everything.

    Basically, I always found myself with men I wasn't very compatible with. But I'd doubt myself, thinking I was just overreacting about [insert whatever here] and I stayed with each of them way longer than I should have, which wasn't long to begin with.

    I still think my first really fucked me up. He knowingly took my virginity (I was 24 and crazy about him), and the next day he dumped with text message saying I'd been too easy. I was hurt, upset, humiliated, I felt stupid and naive, everything you could imagine. And it only got worse from there, so yeah... my past relationships definitely made me not want another.

    • Thanks for sharing your feelings , and we all remember ' endings ' of experiences good or bad . But it can really affect the outcome of the next relationship , however in ' reality ' it has nothing to do with it. The guy that took your virginity is a 'Jerk ' and most guys are not like him , with him it was all about the ' Challenge ' but what goes around , comes around.

    • Show All
    • Cool , This may help you , its about the guys ' Perspective ' on how he could trash your feelings and move on . The guy who dumped you and said you had " Been to easy " has nothing to do with it , the fact that his 'Goal ' was met made him loose interest so he blamed you. Your feelings never registered with him from day one , so don't be to hard on yourself , you were on a different road than he was. There was a total lack of empathy from this guy , because it didn't register in his head.

    • Yeah, I've come to accept that, but it still hurts and it still made me weary. That was the first question I asked here on GAG over 3 years ago, haha!

      So I guess that was some good that came from it, since I now work here and might have never found GAG without him doing that to me... see the light, haha!

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What Girls Said 6

  • I have gone through a lot of bad boy experiences for a 19 year old..

    It's not that I don't want to date- I really do want a bf...

    The boys in my city are generally trashy and commitment phobes lol. Plus, I am VERY picky with guys. A lot of non-cutes ones ask me out, and I ignore. Otherwise, there are guys that are only after one thing, and since I have a very high sex drive I have slept around a little, too.

    That might be part of the problem, but the thing is, I can't seem to find a guy that will ask me "Do you want to go to the X with me next weekend?" They say "Do you want to hang out?" instead, and half the time I go expecting a date and he only wants sex. Then I stop responding and they still try. Like yeah right I'm going to make time for you... NOT. lol

    I really do want a boyfriend. But I have slept around and I'm VERY picky based on looks. I can't seem to find a guy that's good looking, smart, AND classy.

    I've been single for 2 years... :(

    • Thanks , Good honest answer , The ' Hang out ' , a non date is standard stuff in the PUA world and sex is usually next. The trashy guys may know you have slept around a bit and they want some too. Maybe the very picky based on looks only should be re worked because you won't get to the smart and classy bit if he is not a model . Look your only 19 and I'm sure that women are still working out the type of guy they want until their mid twenties . You really have to forget the past dating failures.

    • I Hope you sort out what you really want from a relationship and maybe take a chance on a good guy that asks you out for more than sex :)

  • For sure! I had a period of just okay dates and awkward dates and bad dates. That turned me off for awhile and I would use every excuse I could think of to say "no" to all dates. I even told one guy, "I'm lazy tonight." Yeah, I know...I never heard from him again. LOL

    I just needed to regroup. The time away from it does good, because I can reflect on those dates.

    • Yes, reflect on those dates but don't anticipate the same ending for future dates .

    • Absolutely, agreed! Going about things with no expectation helps a lot, too.

  • King of, I'm mainly not dating because I just don't want to right now. I don't have that many bad experiences anyway lol. I tried having a relationship and realized I just can't commit at the moment. It sucks hurting people :/

    • Sounds sane to me , dating takes up a lot of energy/ Time and if you are too busy with other stuff then it can wait :)

    • Exactly. Relationships also hinder a lot of things - it's nice to be able to make decisions without having to factor in how it would effect someone else :)

  • No but I don't know why no dates :D

  • No, I just wan't to keep my virginity

    • When you hook up with the right guy remember this " Trust is Lust " :)

  • I've dates guys I thought were nice guys. They were sweet and kind and caring. But it turned out it was all an act. I ended up feeling used and terrible about myself. With this one guy I dated he always made me feel bad about myself and made me feel guilty and bad whenever we get into argument even if it wasn't my fault

    • Thanks for being honest about it , Does this affect you now if you want to date someone else ?

    • I'm more cautious now and less trusting

    • Yes , less trusting but still putting yourself out there = good :)

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