Do adult men really have very particular criteria for women in order to date them?

I don't mean a minor preference like "an older woman"

I mean like a criterion like "must change hairstyle often" or something..


Most Helpful Guy

  • While many guys have preferences, the great majority of guys are open to dating a wide range of physical types. They may be more particular about personality and values being compatible with theirs (which is a good thing, because it's important), but "change hairstyle often"? I've never, ever heard a guy wanting that.

    In fact, it's often said that: "A man dates a woman and wants her to stay exactly the same, but she constantly changes, while a woman dates a man and constantly wants him to change, but he always stays the same." While there are exceptions to this, there's also a LOT of truth in those words.

    Most men are looking for the following from women (they want to be in relationships with):

    - that she's physically attractive to him (for most guys, this means he rates her a 5 or above [younger guys or very highly-rated guys may want a higher score; the former usually don't get it though]).

    - a good personality - not insecure, generally pleasant/happy (not depressed), and fun/enjoyable to be around.

    - notices/appreciates the things he does for her

    - cares for him in little ways

    - takes care of his sexual needs

    - gives him some time alone (to relax and do nothing) and/or with his guy friends

    - has *some* level of ambition to improve herself (school, career, business, etc.) and contribute

    - is reasonably responsible financially (doesn't have a ton of debt, doesn't spend every cent that comes her way within an hour, etc.)

    - isn't mentally or emotionally unstable (aka "psycho')

    Really, those shouldn't be very difficult hurdles to get past for most girls. In fact, personality is much more likely to disqualify a girl from consideration than looks or "style" - if a girl is a bitch, or is annoying, or insecure, never stops talking, or insists he spends every free second with her, then the guy is going to lose interest quickly. Most girls always focus on their appearance if they're having trouble getting guys, but in most cases, it's the personality/behavior that's the problem, not her looks.


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What Guys Said 11

  • I would say yea, but most criteria that older MEN have, have to do with personalities and interests.

    We've dated before and have learned what we liked and disliked in a woman. So we look for women who have more of what we like, while having less of what we don't like. Physically, there's mostly just general guidelines, but they're not the determining factor.

    There's plenty of gorgeous women out there. Sure, my penis would like each and every one of them, but my brain wouldn't.

  • I just have 3 requirements:

    1. Attractive enough to get me stiff (not all that difficult a criteria to meet)

    2. Not psycho ( no one wants to wake up with an ice pick in their head or their dog in the micro)

    3. At least a triple-digit IQ (100 is average so again not all that high a standard)

    and oh yes, she has to like me too.

  • Certainly and they're quite absolute!

    -Age: not more than 20% younger or older.

    -Intelligence: good enough for a post HS degree (masters or bachelors) even if she didn't get the degree.

    -Personality: honest and soft (honesty= not married or she wouldn't date)

    -liking art

    -No gold digger liking shiny limousines and Las Vegas

    -Opinions : no religious fanatic

    -physically: no extremes, thus not 85 lbs or 250 lbs

    -No drugs, no tobacco smoking.

    That said, I'm no longer in the dating market since I met my wife in 1967 :D.

    I feel that all the girls feeling they're not up to that will down vote this. :D

    Let the down votes come!

    • Controlling women don't need to apply, of course. I'll not control her either.

  • Yes I'm very particular.

    She has to be into me and love me, and I have to be willing to bang her.

  • I always looked for a brunette or redhead. However fell for a blonde, with her for 5 years now.

    So no, not really.

    Maybe in certain preferences. Like must like/love Star Wars, or something like that. However we tend to be flexible.

  • Although I date girls with different body types, I always go back to skinny girls and small breasts, its just a good combo for me!

    I had an epic fail with this in the girlfriend was a 34D with killer curves who got wolf whistles, but during sex one time I actually said "its not the same". I was thinking about a hot skinny ex at the time...Lol

  • Both of those things are irrelevant. I do have criteria for picking girls that I'm willing to date, but it all centers around their personality. There are certain traits I won't stand for. But age would be a flexible one if she met the other criteria. As far as the hairstyle thing, you're totally going in the wrong direction with this analysis... You need to have substance.

    • I was just using those things as examples that I have heard from people.

  • my philosophy as a man is that beggars can't be choosers. Otherwise I wouldn't get anywhere

    So the only criteria is that they actually want to date me

    • It's easy to get lots of women by not being picky at all but what kind of women? The kind we wouldn't want.

  • Well, my criteria for women is pretty flexible for most things. However, I'm still a boy, so I wouldn't know how adult men think like.

  • no she just has to be cute and have a good personality

  • avg or better looking

    kind, hardworking, passionate, sense of humor, open to new things and a few others

    to sum it up I migth be attracted to a girl by her looks but her personality is what will make me want to date and be with her


What Girls Said 4

  • I have seen some people with some very in depth criteria, but I don't think that everyone is like that.

  • yeah most do.

  • Yes men like women like their mothers

    to be women that clean and take care of them

    companion like a pet always there always happy

    do not care if he cheater

  • My last boyfriend had a bunch of them. Guys want their visual desires to be met more than most other components of relationships. I believe that they cannot feel love without that prerequisite.

    That being said, a lot of adult women have criteria that I find bizarre.