I ask her out by email and her response is...?

Background- We met on Match and have emailed back and forth over 50 times. She is a 28 yo, divorced mom and I am a 38 yo divorced Dad. We both work full time.

We spoke on the phone for over 90 min last thur- I thought things went very well- lots of sharing and laughter. I texted her Friday AM (Very nice speaking with you. Have a great day :))- no response back.

Sat, I stopped by her work (I told her in advance). I just wanted to physically meet her. Introduced myself, she complimented my scarf, asked me about what I bought etc etc. Lots of smiles and nervous energy.

Lst night I email her asking if we could meet Tue afternoon for drinks locally and she responds...

"Im not sure about Tuesday at the moment. I may have an obligation in the afternoon but I won't know until that day. Which is rather unfair to you."

Im new to online dating so I'm busy reading every damn online tips list I can find. Most say this is a blowoff because she didn't offer an alt date, others say because she is a single mom who works that I need to be flex and accept this.

So I know that I need to work on my confidence issues but is this a blowoff?

UPDATE!- Last night around 5:30 I get a text (from a different #)

"Hey. Its _______. Still want to get that drink?"

So I went (First date) and had a great 90 min meet up and we set up a second date :)

FYI- I got a really tight hug


Most Helpful Girl

  • Dude, sorry to say but I also think this is a blow off especially because she let your text go unanswered.

    Like Pandora, I also absolutely always offer an alt day or give a fixed time (ealry next week) for when I will be more sure of my schedule and we can re-open the discussion.

    She's out of her teens and old enough to know that not contributing to planing means it is going to stop sooner or later. She's doing this nicely but intentionally.

    Single moms might need flex but if they are interested, I am sure they will express that.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • Sounds like a "blowoff." If I am really interested in a guy I usually offer another date to meet or tell him I will check my agenda and get back with him that day. Then, I express to him I enjoy his company. That way he knows I am being receptive to him.

  • Yeah I agree signals are hard to read. But the one that isn't is no response. It's nut going to happen


What Guys Said 1

  • Well if she didn't give a date, why didn't you ask her when a good time would be? If she then didn't give an answer, then I'd consider it a blowoff. I actually had this happen earlier today where a date got cancelled and just asked her straight up when a good time was then, which she responded. So now we have another date set (if she blows me off again though, that's my cue to move on).

Loading... ;