Women.. I need your expertise (lengthy read).

Ok there is this girl that I like a lot. When we met she seemed to be so crazy over me and was pressuring me to be with her. I wanted to be with her but was very skeptical because I had never dated a woman with a child before and didn't really have an intention to do so, but as time passed I begin really taking it into consideration until I was like, what the heck.

So, when I finally decided I wanted to be with her I decided that we both should be friends and get to know each other a lot better before we jump into a relationship but she figured I was just stalling her, which I wasn't because she was the ONLY girl I was going to see, kissing, having sex with and etc..

Anyway, a guy at her job was telling her that he is going through a divorce and she's like she is going to be a good friend and try to help him. Well, even though he was married and going through a divorce he told her that he likes her, but used to tell me all the time that nothing could or would possibly come of it so I believed her because of how strongly she talked about marriage and how perfect she wanted it to be.

Well, she told me a few weeks ago that she had sex with him twice. She apologized and I'm like I want nothing to do with you. I called her actions disgusting, as well as his. I can't stand cheaters. She told me she would make it up to me and apologized.

Soon after, I decided to give her another chance because even though her actions were disgusting, she told me that she would not do it again and that she will set boundaries and was like it was a mistake and so on. Another reason is because we were not necessarily together and she told me she did it out of selfishness. Said she felt I did not want her and so on.

We had been doing OK these last few weeks. We hung out and watched movies and things. I have been trying to move on from it but her and the guy still texts which I hate. She tells me she isn't going to completely stop communicating with him because they work together and they have to relay certain messages to each other (managers). Also, says because he's a friend.

Last night things really hit a boiling point and words were said. She told me she disliked me very much for some of the things I was saying about her and her friendship with this guy and was saying how she doesn't want to hear from me again. And I was like whatever.

Ultimately, I said F you and then she texted back, "F me"? And I was like yea... F you (I get pretty emotional when I'm mad). Then I said a lot of other stuff about us and so on. I haven't heard from her today and I don't want to text or call her first because it's her fault for this entire situation.

She claims she loves me, but this is how she acts. I know it's a long read but please help! Overall she's a good girl.

By her deciding to continue to talk to this guy after she originally said she would stop has me feeling as though she's picking this guy and their "friendship" over me.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Sweetie, she is "MORE THAN PICKING" with this guy, and it isn't just "friendship." I think we both know this. She and him have this "hanky panky on and off the job" fling going on, and it is quite obvious they are not just friends with benefits. Take it from me, with all my experience, I guarantee that after he dumps his wife and it is legal, he will be moving in with this "leaping lizard," lock, stock and barrel, joining her with her "baggage" that also resides with her. She doesn't love YOU, and is just playing you for a fool, probably just keeping your "simmering pot", which you even said yourself the other night, boiled over, on the back burner for future use again. She has made her "pick," and it isn't you, sweetie, so if you were smart, and I am sure you are, you will steer as far away from her and Romeo as you possibly can, and this time, don't knock yourself out this time by getting "anything emotional" with her, just send out a text of "Good luck," and then block her. Believe me, this little chickadee is not worth plucking, pecking, or---henpecking for.


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What Girls Said 2

  • end it..she cheated on you with him, even though you say you weren't really together. And on top of that. The guy is still married, they are both scum, and if she was sorry she would have been too ashamed to continue engaging in any text or friendship with him and use the job as an excuse..yeah right. What is she captain save a ho? she's a douche bag and she is setting a bad example for her child. She will only continue giving you more heart ache. Run!

  • Purely on the basis of your story, it seems like you both never were really together and that you didn't want to make it official with her because you were 'taking it slow'.

    I understand guys who want to 'take it slow' but I also understand why she did what she did. So I would understand if she really likes you and wants to be with you but because you keep rejecting her and out of frustration, she has sex with some other guy that really wants her. It's not surprising at all.

    Plus she told you about it (she has no need to do so, since you're not together) which means she probably felt guilty enough about it and would still like to try to work things out with you. It probably is true that she can't cut off all communication with this guy because of work and honestly, in my opinion, you've no right to demand her to stop talking to a 'friend'.

    Think about it. Why would she stop talking to him if there's a chance that you might NEVER be with her? Why do that for you?

    • She would take a chance for me because we were going to be together. She was the only girl I talked to and she KNEW that. Even when other girls crossed my path I didn't talk to them because of her and she knew that. Many times I have stayed up talking to her when I could have been sleeping (had to be up early the next day). When she is having a bad day she wold call me to calm her down. I put important things off just to hang to with her and she knew that.

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