So oblivious!

most of the time I'm so oblivious to the fact that a guy likes me... I would think that the guy is cool and always be talking/texting and and hanging out(I would think nothing of it because I like to hangout with guys) and out of the blue they would be like"i like you" this point I am lost for words...seriously I must be an idiot or something.


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What Guys Said 1

  • You have said some dangerous things. If you go down the path of thinking you are supposed to read someones mind you are going to have a horrible time building a relationship.

    I think you have to take a different more objective view of the world. In this society, all the pressure is on a man to chase women.

    Therefore, you have to realize that the reason so many guys are your friends is that all of them (yes 100% of those interested in women, want you) see that you are worth chasing. This means you are probably a great person #1 and as such attractive. Probably look nice as well. They are all actually doing the pre-dating thing, some would say they are dating you if they are paying for your meals and buying you birthday presents or sending ecard, grabbing a sluppie for you, and any other time they do something for you that they don't do for their boys. Did your guy friend buy his buddy a slurppie too? Did he take his buddy out to eat just because? Did he offer to help his buddy with homework or walk with him home from school?

    Some guys speak up and try to transition from friend to more. Others can see that you have mad options of guy friends and are waiting for you to make a statement of liking them. The ball is in your court to choose any of your guy friends that you want. The more you deny these facts the harder it will be for you to understand why a guy is talking/texting/hanging with you. In this society and in your case, you have all the power to initiate, deny, or accept a relationship to move beyond friends. Use it wisely and with care for our fragile male hearts!

    Also beware thinking that you can retain all these potential suitors in their current friendship positions when you do choose to have a serious relationship. They don't all have to be cut off as friends but you will have to change and set aggressive boundaries. Funny thing is that will make them all want you more. By distancing them from your relationship you show that you would be that much more of a good woman. If they cross those boundaries and disrespect your relationship, then are they really your friend? No. Some will and you have to make the decision between your friendship and your relationship. Can't have both.

    And besides with all these guys dating you around, how are you supposed to guess if they would like to go further until they tell you? You just need to know that they are all interested and beyond that don't buy into the mind reading nonsense. You or the guy have to say "I like you" or similar to make the transition.

    • Wow...i really appreciate your answer....i have never looked at it that way before.Thinking about it, I'm feeling sort of bad for not realizing these things .

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