How much does it take for a woman to push a man away?

I went on a few dates with a guy and it seems to be going really well on all levels. There were two instances when I may have seemed needy. I'm not usually like that, I don't know what happened! Anyway, one of the two examples is we were talking about things to do for a date next week, and for some reason I said something like- so, we'll see each other, right? My tone of voice may have seemed a bit, well, overeager? He smiled and answered "yeah!" but I could detect some exasperation on his part. We kissed and hugged goodbye.

That was yesterday. I worry I may have freaked him out, so I'm going to wait another day before I text him if he doesn't text me first. Good idea? That will give him a 48 hour break from my neediness. Ugh, dating sucks.

How many times does a woman have to act needy for a man to say forget it? I wouldn't just drop someone after two annoying incidences, especially if lots of other good stuff was going on. And if the person were as cute as me. See, I'm not that insecure. :)

Should I drop it or bring it up and apologize? I don't want to seem more needy or insecure, but if I have raised any doubts in his mind about whether he wants to be with me, I want to try to fix it.

Sign me, "Feeling Needy and Hating it Because I Should be Over this Stuff at My Age".


Most Helpful Guy

  • Who cares if you come off as needy. If you hide that aspect of yourself in the early dating stages and he's someone who cannot handle it, what happens then when you're deeply invested in the outcome?

    You'll only stand to have your hopes dashed on open rocks.

    People exhibit different degrees of emotion. Never apologize for doing something that doesn't negatively effect someone. Be strong in who you are in hopes of finding someone is of the same mind.

    • This is very insightful and has given me much to think about. Perhaps challenging conventional wisdom and numerous books about dating rules could do all of us some good! This was an unexpected and enlightening answer.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't bring up your 'neediness' or that you're not being clingy with him or anything. That will not only draw more attention to it, but it will also make you come off more insecure to him which he more than likely wouldn't be a fan of. I also wouldn't say that the comment you made to him is clingy. You guys are dating, not in a relationship, and as long as you don't make a pattern of that I'm sure you will be fine.

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