Is he just using me for company? How can I decipher his true intentions from all the way over here?

I met this guy online in another country. We are both in our late 20's. Yes, he's the real deal. We have video chatted plenty of times, everything adds up on Facebook (he doesn't have one, but I do and he's told me his friends names). I know his parents, I know his address!

His intentions are the thing that is hard to tell. He expresses having feelings but by saying he wishes he were here, wishes I were there. Has told me plenty of times he's attracted to me calling me hot, pretty, gorgeous etc. but not overly saying it or anything.

We talk about flights and passports and figuring it out. It seems more and more likely it will happen, I think he's just waiting in me getting a passport. He talks about coming here but more about me going there. I'd rather he come here too though, I mean obviously anything working out from it is not guaranteed... Is that what he's thinking too? I mean in terms of a relationship.

He messages me every single day. Even if it's just once, even if he says something and leaves my message until the following day, there is always communication.

Well the thing is, he talks to me mainly when he is working all alone and it's overnight. He does security for an overnight job.

He says he's lonely when he's at work alone at night. He's told me this several times. I fear that is the only reason why he's talking to me though. It's not that he never talked to me during the day, but he used to more. Now there's a lot of silence until the evening hours. I even told him I feel like I only hear from him when he's there!

How can I know he's not just needy? I figure meet him with the intentions of us just being friends... But the way he's talking it's like he wants more. I do too if he's genuine, not needy, you know?

How can I figure this out, it's hard over the internet. I am assuming he's just needy though, to be honest.


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  • I think your odds of finding the "real deal" is far better locally. Just sayin
    Clear your doubts by asking him direct questions.

  • Don't assume! Your best bet is to ask him.

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