When is it the appropriate time to have "the talk" with the guy your seeing?

When you talk about what you are to eachother and whether it is official or not.

Should you wait a certain amount of time?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well it depends on where you are at. There's no rule or certain amount of dates needed as far as my knowledge goes. I think you have to take into consideration how much time has been spent together, how far things have progressed physically and how well you two have gotten to know each other before it's time for "the talk". I'd say to play it safe it's good to wait at least 2 months assuming there's been active dates going on. Reason for my estimation is just solely based on past mistakes (I have a tendency to have "the talk" too early which has lead to many disasters) and the amount of time I'd assume it will talk to know for sure if you have a connection with someone. I could be totally wrong though. As I said, many factors should be taken into consideration before deciding if it's the right time. The biggest danger is doing it too soon and I'd assume that anywhere after a 2 month period can't really be seen as too soon anymore. Especially if you see each other weekly and have been intimate.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • "Official"? You make it sound like at some point in time in a relationship we should all get a badge or sumpthin. I've never had the conversation you speak of. I'd meet a girl, start dating her and if things went in the right direction for a prolonged period we'd get married. To me "official" means putting a ring on her finger and saying "I do". Maybe I'm just old.

    • No just when you talk about if you are exclusive with that person or not- whether you are girlfriend/ boyfriend or you are still able to see other people.

What Girls Said 1

  • I think (and I know this sounds really cheesy and lame) but I personally tend to just know when the time is right. Again, that sounds very rom-comesque, but.
    If things are still a bit awkward around you two, it's not really the best time to confess feelings or whatever. Sometimes, it's pretty obvious when a good time would be.
    Say you guys just went out on a really good non-official date and it was obvious that he enjoyed it and you did as well. You can ask/state then.
    However, sometimes it's just something that you sort of fall into without the need to officially clarify anything.

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