Guys - What behavior would a girl display that would make you label her as "desperate"?

List some things that would come off as desperate in your opinion when first dating a girl.

If a girl has come off as desperate or too strong in the beginning, is there anything she can do to redeem herself?

Thank you :-)


Most Helpful Girl

  • Overall, consistent clingy and needy behavior.
    1.) She texts him excessively. This is okay if he reciprocates it, but if she's texting him more than he's texting her; it just looks desperate.
    2.) She throws little tantrums if he doesn't text her back within a few hours
    3.) She smothers him
    4.) She seems to naturally expect girlfriend treatment, despite not officially gaining the title, and gets an attitude if she's not getting it

    To redeem herself, she just needs to chill out and stop being all over him. Guys do not like to be smothered. Especially if they haven't even decided how much they like you and whether they want you to be theirs. Don't start dating a guy and make him the center of your life. They can sense that and for many guys, it's a turn off because it puts a lot of pressure on the dating experience. Just relax and let him come to you : ) and ALWAYS REMEMBER: You have GOT to CONSISTENTLY show him why he wants you around. Even if in the most subtle way. You can't expect a guy to want to date you if all you do is show the less favorable, more unpleasant sides of who you are.

    • the most perfect, concise, helpful advice i've ever seen on the topic

    • Show All
    • We had been hanging out for about a month - we only saw each other on the weekends so 1 time each weekend. Like I said he is super shy. We were moving along really well then he started getting phone calls for interviews (he had applied for jobs because he just finished college a few months back in the medical field) Turns out this jobs are throughout the U. S. So he said he wanted to not get too serious until he knows where he is going to end up for a job. We text about that last week. I haven't text him this week yet. I don't know if I will come off as desperate still bugging him even after he said that or what? He says he likes hearing from me but I'm a little concerned to get too wrapped up with him emotionally considering he may move far away if the right opportunity presents itself

    • Don't worry so much about the future. Live in the now. For all you know, he may not even be a long term fit for you so there's no point in getting all worried about that now. Just enjoy the time you have with him now : ) Embrace the unpredictability of it all. Seriously girl, make plans with him. It will be more fulfilling and there's a better chance he'll break out of his shell when he's actually with you face to face.

      Thanks for ba! : )

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What Guys Said 2

  • she's constantly texting/ trying to socialize with him, she goes crazy when they haven't talked in a shorter amount of time, etc. There are others i just can't think of right now

  • Coming across as desperate is not a problem. Being clingy is. What's the difference? 'Desperate' is how YOU feel. 'Clingy' is how you make ME feel, i. e. pressured. As long as I don't feel pressured, it's fine.


What Girls Said 0

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