Ever dated someone who was very quiet?

So there's this girl who messaged me on a dating site a few weeks back. She's kinda cute and she wants to have a date, but the problem is she is very hard to talk to and she lives kinda far away.

Whenever I talk to her, it feels like i'm interviewing her instead of having a conversation. Whenever I talk to her or ask questions about herself, she'll give very generic, one-word responses. I'll ask her how her weekend is and she'll just say boring or when I ask her what she's up to, she'll say just watching tv. I'll say what are you watching then she'll be like just a few things.

I'm not saying I expect her to talk all the time, but it feels like I'm talking to a wall. I don't think she's a bad person but I feel like if we do meet up, it'll be boring as hell and I'll have to think about a bunch of stuff to talk about before the date which I don't like. It'll seem forced.

I'm willing to give her a chance, but I just don't feel like we connect. Has anyone ever dated someone like this? If so, did it last. Were you able to make them somewhat talkative?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I've dated people who are quiet/reserved in general, but with me they were always chatty because we had a lot in common.

    I think if conversation is stunted and doesn't flow freely, you probably just aren't connecting with one another. Personally, I wouldn't be interested, but if you want to give it a shot, go for it. Maybe she just needs to get comfortable.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • I'm dating a quiet guy, it sucks. I don't think it's going to last long. I would say give her a chance if she's trying give her some credit, if she's not move on...

  • I've dated quiet people, but this girl sounds just boring...

    • Yep insanely boring. It's weird though because I've had times where I connected with girls prior to meeting and then it fizzled when we met. Granted the one time that did happen was because a girl decided our date was at her friend's band's show and invited her friends to come along with. That got awkward. I'm saying there could be a chance it's better in person.

    • Show All
    • Yeah it's been a weeks since we last talked. She's made no attempt plus she lives an hour away. Didn't seem like it was going anywhere, but whatever I'm talking to other girls now that live closer and have a lot in common with me.

What Guys Said 1

  • wow, interesting situation.

    i feel she may have something to hide. lol. is she a nerdy type?

    • No clue. She doesn't say much about herself, no matter how much I ask lol. Weird thing is she approached me first.

    • maybe she thinks she is not living up to her "standard", whether that is good or bad, I don't know. it may be low self esteem or it may also mean she wanted something more physical. lol

      still, as a guy, im still saying, communication is very important to a long term, you are marrying someone for who they are. how a relationship is build is from communication.
      you can ask her though, why don't she speak too much, is she ashamed of herself or she doesn't trust you. maybe let her decide on the topic. something easy going, google on shy girls. talk something she likes or knows very well, like her favourite shows.
      what places can you bring her that she'll talk more.. I don't know

      i wish i can help you more, but maybe i don't understand that girl.

    • Yeah who knows what the real reason is, but I didn't contact her for a full week last week and then this past Saturday she texted me asking about when were going to meet up. I wanna ask her why she isn't talkative but not be offensive about it either or make it seem like im attacking her.

      It just seems weird because she was the one who initiated contact in the first place. It could be all physical like you said.

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