How to attract women and eventually get a gf?

Can anyone give need me some basic tips on how to attract women so eventually I can get a gf? Keep in mind I've been told I'm average looking. A 5.. and I'm very shy and have never approached a girl except for online but online has gotten me dates but not second dates. I eat approach in person. . I need all your help. . Thank you


Most Helpful Guy

  • When it comes to female attraction, most of it is driven off intangibles (as in emotional / mental stimulation more than your actual looks).

    Male attraction is mostly tangible looks; you seem to think that female attraction works the same as male attraction.

    Forget you being a "5" ; put in effort to make yourself look as good as possible.

    Make sure you eat a healthy diet (some binges are OK), make sure you stay consistently physically active to stay in decent shape, dress well for your bodytype and develop a personal style.

    • Thanks. . All I can do is try

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    • liking yourself is very important; that's a good idea!

    • Problem is I don't know how long that will take.. I'm approaching 40 and if I don't get a wife before 40 I will never date

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Just be yourself and be very friendly

    • I can do that easily. . But remember I'm only a 5

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    • I didn't say make friends with her.just be friendly when you approach her

    • I can do that I'm naturally friendly. . I just don't know how to flirt

What Guys Said 5

  • Stop giving a shit about how attractive you are. Approach every woman like they are attracted to you. Stop being shy.

    • I'll try. . I can stop thinking about being attractive but I don't know about being shy..

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    • You only talk to don't listen. . Did you read where I said I hurt my back

    • It makes sense you choose that user name cuz you don't want to hear people..yadda yadda

  • Basic advice:
    - Sort out your appearance: dress well, hit the gym and build yourself an athletic/muscular body, get a nice haircut
    - Approach women: I know you're shy, but the only way to get over shyness is to force yourself to do it. Most shy people look at this the wrong way round, they want to wait until they feel confident BEFORE approaching women, when in fact you build more and more confidence the more women you approach.
    - Stop being a pussy and make a move: as a man it's your job, again, you get the confidence by doing it over and over

    This is a great book on getting women, simple and easy to follow:

    And this is a great book on getting over shyness:

    Hope this helps

    • Thank you for the links.. I'm not doing the gym thing though. . Very superficial

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    • If you don't want to pay for the gym bodyweight exercises will do, and if you can't do one push up or sit up I'd say you have serious problems.

      Anyway, it looks like you have your mind made up on the gym/exercise thing lol, so we might as well agree to disagree on that. Hope the rest helps though, good luck :)

    • Thanks for your vote of confidence

  • Honestly, in your case? Money and status. Also, do yourself a favour and never get married or pay for anything. That will weed out the golddiggers.

  • Just copy what other successful men are doing.

    • How? It's not like I can get up close to them to see

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    • I can't go to bars/ clubs anymore. What you say makes total sense though.. Thank you

    • It's actually better you're not in a bar or a club. When you are in a place like a cafe there's tons of things to talk about, the local area, the cafe itself and any nostalgia attached, the atmosphere, and all of these can be redirected freely. When you're in a club it's a very in-and-out process sort of like one giant speed-dating arena.

  • First find a girl?

    • I have. . They're everywhere

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    • Right away?

    • yeah...

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