Best friend is making moves on girl I like- help please?

My best friend, & other friends have encouraged me to ask this girl out.
I asked her out, I've been on a date with her.
I've struggled to get a second date with her though, for one reason or another.
I'm still trying though, and she is still showing interest.

She returns to France in July and is going to decide whether to come back for another year in September- I think that's why she isn't committing to second date yet as she isn't sure if she's coming back.

I've put in a lot of time and effort into her, and to be honest it's been exhausting. I'm going to let her make her mind up, give her space, see if she says anything and I'll ask again in a few months if she decides to stay.

So my best friend knows all this. He knows my plan, he knows what happened so far and he knows I like her. He's encouraged me to keep going.

However, recently I can see he's trying to make moves with her.
He's the sort of guy that's always looking for a relationship, and sort of goes for any (hot) girl that moves.
He's a great guy to be fair, and lots of people like him. He's better looking than me, and tbh doesn't have to try as hard as I do with girls. So I can tell when he's going for a girl.

He's been liking a lot of her stuff on Facebook (and her back), they appear on Facebook at the same time, whenever they both go on.

When we were with friends in a pub, I was about to buy her a drink when he jumped in and insisted it was on him.

He keeps hugging her goodbye. Even my one on one conversations with her, he has to get involved.

It's frustrating as I feel like if he keeps it up, she will end up liking him- he's just that sort of guy.
I don't understand why he's getting involved when he has encouraged me to go out with her, keep trying and knows the situation and that I like her.

Tbh, this is the first girl I've asked out- I'm not the guy who is interested in relationships...or who even can attract girls- so I feel that my 1 rare chance is being crushed.

Any other opinions before I go to bed? :)


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What Girls Said 6

  • He is not your best friend. If she goes out with him, she is not worth any mental space and energy

    • In fairness to her, it's her choice who she likes. But, he shouldn't be making himself available and putting himself at the forefront of her mind, if he knows I'm interested and has even told me to ask her out.

    • Of course she can! That wasn't the point. My point is if she does go out with your friend, then she isn't the one for you. Therefore forget about her. Your friend is the one who breaking the cardinal rule of friendship. That friendship is needs to be reevaluated

  • This is one of those things where I would just be like "oh HELL NO"

    You havee to stand up and talk to him. Tell him that this girl is YOURSS. Chances are, your guy friend will back off AND the girl you like will be totally flattered.

  • Stand up to your friend. Tell him you see what he's doing and that it's fucked up. I'd even tell him that if he doens't back off you guys are no longer friends

  • Try to confront him about the situation in a gentle but firm manner. Ask him what his intentions are.

  • You're supposed to be friends, so I'm assuming that you're on the level where you two are able to talk it out. Don't let him intimidate you. If you want this girl, let him know that you want him to BACK. OFF.

  • What a backstabbing P.O.S. He should respect that you liked her first. WOW. Why are you still friends with him? this is total BS...

    • Ah I don't know . I wouldn't want to lose a great friend over a's just this one issue.
      Tbh I'm not sure why he's doing it. Part of me thinks he doesn't even realise he's doing it- it's just his nature.
      There's a joke with our friends that he's always looking for a girlfriend and pounces on anything that moves.

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    • You are a very kinda and patient friend.

What Guys Said 1

  • Tell him to back the f**k off. If he is any sort of friend he will.
    If he doesn't...kick him in the...hard